Time for the next hard part...

[amika98]

Okay, bf of 2.5 years, lives in my house I rent from my parents, he's been here for a little over a year, very healthy, decent relationship but it has become clear to me today(been analyzing it for past 2-3 months though), I can't marry him, he's not the one. I've never felt really truly desired and wanted by him since day 1 and it's probably because we're just not right for each other. October is really the last month of "moving season" where I am, so I have to do this fast or it's going to get tricky. I'm not angry at him, I'd give him 4 weeks max to move out...just due to pain and awkwardness and stuff like that...not healthy right after a break up to still be living together.

 

If anyone has some advice, please let me know. Anything from how to do this with minimizing the hurt on him to what to be careful of from the living together situation. I think we're both mature adults, both 30 and can do this as respectfully as possible. I'm just very nervous as it seems he'll likely be shocked by my decision. I had a talk with him last weekend that I was having anxiety about our relationship, but he didn't have an ounce of concern about my concern...I just don't think he's picked up on what I've been putting down. And I'm also nervous since this is my first doing the breaking up where its a decent guy who didn't do anything wrong. I feel guilty...but keeping on would be much crueler as we don't fulfill each other's needs when it comes down to it. We had talked about a future with marriage, kids, all that...so it's the whole pain package...ohhhhh I'm scared. Lol

[Movingforward3]

You need to think this through and make sure you are done. You will stake this relationship for good.

When you do this it should be in a calm setting. When he is not going to work the next day. Mid day I would say. You must be firm and state there is no good way to say this. Let him down easy and say it is you. You have thought this through and no chance to re council or fix it. The relationship is over and you want to make the break as clean as possible. Be kind and understanding, but firm in your resolve. He will attempt to persuade you, otherwise. Just don't play games. End it without leaving chance.