Roasted Carrots Posted January 23, 2005 Share Posted January 23, 2005 My friend sent me this link (I posted the link at the bottom) and I read the paper and decided I HAD to post a link. I see a lot of "I'm a Nice Guy, Where's my reward? Where's my girl?" type of posts. Well, here's (part of)your reward! I wish I had written it. Have comfort that I agree with it. So kick back, you Nice Guys, and indulge in a little thanks from us. We hope you find your special someone soon. This paper was found at stwing.upenn.edu/~jenf/writing/rant04.html Can't post it, it contains a wee bit of profanity. Sorry about that. Just use the link! 8) Link to comment
WhiteIcE Posted January 23, 2005 Share Posted January 23, 2005 Thank you for the link. It's in a way kinda inspiring. Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 23, 2005 Share Posted January 23, 2005 OUTSTANDING!!! -DG724 Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 ive experienced the 'bad boys' 8) & the ones with 'nice guy syndrome' i knew i grew up when i stopped stressin the jerky bad boys & felt terrible for ever hurting or disappointing those great guys i passed up... hey, ya live & learn... -DG724 Link to comment
SkyFire Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 /me pukes all over the screen Link to comment
Strictly4MyGrind Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 Just another so called "nice guy" crying to himself and trying to find sympathy......Self pitty Ha...... Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 /me pukes all over the screen what made u yakk all over your computer? -DG724 Link to comment
Lonelyinasmalltown Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 Very inspiring, makes proud to be a nice guy. I just wish we didn't always finish last. Of all the women I've met and know, they always go for the bad boys and live to regret it. Except for one. She didn't make it, her BF didn't want her with anyone else, and made sure of it. RIP my friend. It's been 5 years and I still miss you. Link to comment
SkyFire Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 what made u yakk all over your computer? -DG724 The whole nice guy thing, as described in the original post. (not to offend any "nice guys" on the site..). Link to comment
Lonelyinasmalltown Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 Skyfire. I'm a little offended but everyone's entitled to their opinion (damn nice guy syndrome kicking in again). Personally, I don't see anything wrong with respecting people and wanting to treat them they way they deserve to be treated. Especially women. DragonGirl724, It's nice to hear that there's at least one woman out there who realizes that the nice guys aren't only good for doormats! Codos! You're a woman who definitely deserves a nice guy who will treat you like a princess! I hope you find one someday. Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 DragonGirl724, It's nice to hear that there's at least one woman out there who realizes that the nice guys aren't only good for doormats! Codos! You're a woman who definitely deserves a nice guy who will treat you like a princess! I hope you find one someday. smalltown, thank you so much for your kind words. i agree everyone deserves their own right for opinion, but i agree nice guys are where its at. theres a fine line though between 'nice guys' & suckers...i dont think even 'nice guys' should tolerate a lot of crap ppl throw at them. i like nice guys w/ a backbone. mucho importante' im sorry about your loss... i lost a great guy to a drunk driver in 2001. i can understand your pain. -DG724 Link to comment
MetalJoe Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 Cheers for that. I chuckled to myself a few times while reading it SkyFire, what is your problem? Link to comment
Lonelyinasmalltown Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 smalltown, thank you so much for your kind words. i agree everyone deserves their own right for opinion, but i agree nice guys are where its at. theres a fine line though between 'nice guys' & suckers...i dont think even 'nice guys' should tolerate a lot of crap ppl throw at them. i like nice guys w/ a backbone. mucho importante' im sorry about your loss... i lost a great guy to a drunk driver in 2001. i can understand your pain. -DG724 Thanks DG, Although my friend and I never dated, we were really close. I was the guy who she would always come to talk about problems with her boyfriend. To this day I still can't believe that neither of us saw just how unstable he really was until it was too late, after she left him. I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you. I guess we can both say that we lost someone we loved because of inconsiderate idiots. Link to comment
Sheyda Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 lol amen to that 0.0..... sigh i hate being single, where are the nice girls when ya need em here? I don't really mind being single, but I do get lonely and wonder exactly the same thing about the nice guys. It's strange how there are so many nice people that come on here and complain about not being able to find a nice girl/guy; I bet if all the people from enotalone met up, everyone with this problem would find someone. Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 I bet if all the people from enotalone met up, everyone with this problem would find someone. you know what, ive thought the same thing before. if people from enot in pretty close distances from eachother met up im sure a lot of us would get along great. personally, i met a lot of cool people from the syte. a girl from here is goin to vegas w/ me in march, another i plan to visit whenever im in maryland,im real close with ppl in florida & rhode island id love to meet, and when i am back in NYC im meeting up with another chick that lives in Brooklyn. i actually met up with a guy from NJ that posted like 1 time on this forum then he IMed me, he was a nice guy, but uhh...in all honesty, he liked me a little 'too much' . lol its def cool to talkt o people that live so close that youve never met before. its good to break out of the box every now & then & meet someone new. -DG724 Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 24, 2005 Share Posted January 24, 2005 I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you. I guess we can both say that we lost someone we loved because of inconsiderate idiots. definitily. he was a previous bf of mine. it was indeed devestating. but its amazing how we can find the ability to learn & grow from such tragedies. -DG724 Link to comment
Lonelyinasmalltown Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 SKyfire, I just read your post on Shyness (very good BTW) and I think you're confusing being a nice guy with being shy. Sure a lot of nice guys are shy (typically most of them I would say), but that doesn't mean that all of them are. I'm a nice guy, I have no problem expressing my feelings to the opposite sex (most of the time lol), speaking in front of a crowd (I teach part-time), etc, etc but I still get left on the side of the road for the bad boys (AKA jerks). I have literally 10's of women all saying that they wish their boyfriends/finances/husbands were just like me. Well, that's nice.... Link to comment
SkyFire Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 Ugh. Please people, read between the lines. I replied that I am not for the nice guy that is described IN THE MAIN POST!!! Hell, there is nothing wrong with being nice and kind. I am very nice to people. but you gotta have respect for yourself!!! If a girl is telling you her guy problems, you are being disrespected. If a girl calls you to a date and doesent show up, you are being disrespected. If you have to resort to buying her drinks and gifts in order to gain her approoval, you are disrespected! Those are the times when you have to act. Be nice, but have some self-respect to stand up for ytourself! The nice guys who never get chicks are the nice guys who worship and smother the woman with attention. You gotta be more selfish then that. If you arent happy with something a girl does, dont put up with it. That is what it comes down to. Link to comment
SkyFire Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 Also to lonelyinasmalltown: You say you should treat people the way they deserve to be treated. Im sorry, but what is it about most girls that makes you want to treat them so well? Because they are "beautiful and special?" I wont give into that. I find it false. Treat YOURSELF good. As said above, it all comes down to self-respect. Never put the chick higher then you. Your life comes before hers. Wake up man!! Look carefully, self-respect is the deciding factor! Link to comment
Lonelyinasmalltown Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 Don't disagree with what you're saying, really. You need to look out for number one first. Still, have you've ever been friends with a woman who you're interested in but isn't quite interested in you? Does it make them a bad person because they aren't into you that way? It's not a bad thing to listen to their problems if you think you can help. Just don't fixate yourself on that one woman, meet more women. Eventually word gets around that you're a nice guy. Nice guys do finish last, but when they do finish they get the last laugh. They usually get the women who are truly committed, in for the long haul and won't break your heart. The nice guy in the post basically described me to a T, with the exception of one thing. I have tons of women friends and it's amazing the amount of dates a nice guy gets if he's truly a nice guy. My woman friends are the type of people who know I want to find that special someone and even if they don't want to be with me, really put a lot of effort into finding women for me. I've been out with lots of women, and only one of them was one that I asked out myself. Some I could do without, but the vast majority were attractive and nice and even though they didn't work out, they're still my friends, hence I'm out on dates every other weekend with someone new (still haven't found someone that I can connect with). It's like a network of people scoping out for you. Others have to do that all by themselves. The nice guy syndrome can be a curse, but it can be a true blessing too. You just need to have respect for yourself and try not to build up unrealistic expectations, that's what makes the difference. Link to comment
Driftin Spirit Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 I am said to be the nicest guy many girls have ever met but it doesnt stop me getting into a relationship with them. I dont know about american and english girls but i am an aussie and here those jerks are out of the picture after school finishes cause its the nice who can have fun and afford it cause generally speaking they are the ones with uniplaces and jobs. Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 thats why in my reply i said whats important is to find a 'nice guy with a backbone'. doormats will get nowhere in life but just dug deeper into the ground b/c people stay walking all over them. but not all nice guys are doormats. -DG724 Link to comment
HajiMaji Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 Man im diggin this post. I dont mean to get all religious on yall, but check this. Whos the nicest dude to ever live? Jesus right? Hes mad nice. He wasnt a sucker. I like what dg said about theres a fine line between nice dudes and suckers. I couldnt agree more. Be like jesus; super nice and not a sucker. It drives me freakin bonker nuts when i hear guys complaining about not getting women even though they are super nice. Man, lemme tell ya - being super nice is honestly my main goal in life but ill never whine about "finishing last" cause really i never do. Its all your mind set. If you are nice to another person, do it out of the beauty and love in your heart. NOT because you want some sweet lovin. That is why you feel like you loose. Giving out of love is the best feeling in the world, and if you do that you automatically finish first. To me, thats the goal in life TO LOVE not TO BE LOVED. Once you realize that its all good and you controll how happy you are. Man, i was awesome to all my ex girlfriends, and it makes me feel so good. I feel so good about giving all the time and energy i can to my boys. Its life and its all about spreading the niceness. Dont be nice cause you think that will get you in with the females. To be nice to get in with the females is just like having a smooth pick up line or going after tipsy women. Its game cause you arent doing it out of your true heart. Dig deep down and live from the goodness in your heart and believe me women will be all up on you! Thats the hard part though, being genuinely good Its much easier to be "sweet" and wine about girls not wantin a piece. Ok ok ok, sorry yall i got carried away... I didnt mean for this to be directed twords anyone, but i have met dudes in life and it breaks my heart cause its like they are stuck in this mentality of im nice and i always loose so i will drink my own urine cause thats what im worth. Being nice feels so good! How can you let it bring you down like that! Link to comment
arrowbee Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 Whos the nicest dude to ever live? Jesus right? Hes mad nice. He wasnt a sucker. I like what dg said about theres a fine line between nice dudes and suckers. I couldnt agree more. Be like jesus; super nice and not a sucker. Jesus didn't date much. Link to comment
HajiMaji Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 Haha, well its not like i get all the ladies, but thanks for what ya said Its defainately true what you said about sulking and being negative.. Its all about the vibes you give. Somtimes you gotta sulk or whatever though if you are feeling it cause otherwise you turn into my ex girlfriend who SEEMED positive and genuinely happy but turns out had a lot of things to deal with. Man, after me and my ex broke up, i was sad for a super long time and you could tell i wasnt gettin any female attention (i mean thats probably natures way of letting us deal with loss - i definitely didnt need another relationship to complicate matters at that time) Man, i think jesus got married, but regardless say he never dated once in his life. Dont you think he would have made the best romantic partner ever? The dude was so genuinely loving and caring. Thats all anyone really needs. I want a genuinely nice and loving woman! Link to comment
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