last night......

[SaSaRai]

yesterday my friend came over and we had fun all day and played around,played games, went to basketball practice for school and then my brother rented the gym that night so we went out there and played again. Then we came back home and played charades with my brother and his girlfriend.

 

After that.... that night..... we were supposed to go to bed because of our game that we played earlier this morning. But we stayed up and talked about things like working out and girls etc etc. Then we were laying in the floor next to eachother because my mom had already came down to check and see if we were asleep, and we started talking about how other guys "circle jerk" and experiemnt with their friends. He's pretty shy... and I can be sometiems too, we were thinking of comparing, but he didnt really feel comfotable with it - but i think thats because neither one of us had even seen the other one without a shirt. (we havent really known eachother but 8 months) So then we decided to show eachtoher our body without a shirt... and he wouldnt take it all the way off... he doesnt like his body because he thinks he's not hairry, tan , or big enough. When I feel the exact opposite almost.... but , he let me touch him stomach and chest and rub it..... (thats where i started thinking...) I really liked it... and after that i asked him if i could do it 2 more times... and he let me.

 

After that he said he started feeling weird about it (he always feels weird about things when he thinks about it alot - so why was he thinking about it so much?) Then he wanted to do the same thing to me, but i wouldnt let him because i didnt want to show him myself either. (no ones ever seen my chest or stomach unclothed) he asked me several times but i just couldnt bring myself to do it..... next time I think I'll let him though.... I was really wanting to experiment with him but I think he's too worried about his body to do it and because he hasnt even seen me without a shirt (because he said - dude i think its cool to show eachother but... i havent even seen u without a shirt... )

 

Do you think he wants to do it too? I was just scared to let him touch me cuz i have some hair around my belly button , im 15 and hes 14 and hes sorta on the slim side but hes cut. And im bigger, and not really "cut" but im not even close to fat. I just didnt want him to touch me and feel that... do you think its a big deal? I have a small patch on my chest too... i didnt want him to feel that... but i really wanted to let him...

 

 

what does this sound like? i am not really sure of my sexuality , and thats why i want to try... and i like him more than any one else so i wanna try it with him....

 

give me and ideas, comments, advice thta comes to mind thanks guys!

[shorty4ever15]

Hey SaSaRai,

 

Good ole' teen years. Enjoy it because if you let things slip by you'll regret it later in life--TRUST ME!!!

 

Anyway, as for your situation with your friend. It really sounds like you were both just curious. It sounds like you two have a great friendship going for you. It is hard for anybody your age to declare their sexual orientation. Your at the age where you need to find out about yourself. From my own personal opinion, your friend had the chance to experiment. The same goes for you. Even though you might think it is not that common. It really isn't uncommon at all. Many teenagers experiment with people of the same sex. That is why you do not see too many people your age that are extremely self-confident.

 

I've said something like this in one of my previous posts to someone else once and it goes along the lines of--Is what you were thinking and doing signs that you might be gay? well....yea it is but it is just part of the experimenting phase. The thing that makes me wonder though is that you seem to have really enjoyed it despite your self-consciousness.

 

My advice to you--though it is not going to be easy to do since you are insecure about your body--is that if you are ever in that situation again with your friend, you take it as far as you both want to. Don't force him into anything, but don't hold yourself back. The only way you are going to find out about yourself is if you let yourself experiment. What goes on with you two will more than likely remain your secret, so what do you have to lose. Maybe if you come to find that you really might be gay, you can start to gain some confidence in yourself.

 

I've noticed that you have posted about questioning your sexuality before. Those posts is what I am basing this on. I'd hate to see you slip into a depression because you are afraid to get "close" to anyone because you are unsure of yourself. You may come to find that you are not gay. You may also find out you are. But, I really think you have an oppurtunity to learn more about yourself here and I would hate to see you pass it up.

 

If you need to talk or anything, feel free to PM me.

 

Good Luck with everything.

~Shorty

[depressedteen]

hmm... i think he wants to do it too, and i believe if you dont do it as a child you'll regret it later because its a great experience, really it is. definitely dont worry about your body just let his hands wonder and you do the same, and just keep touching new places .....

[SaSaRai]

hmmm...... so are you saying that maybe i should just ask him if he wants to experiment? How would i ask him something like that? what would i do? I mean you live life once, so why not try something new? Is there any way I could talk to him about it to convince him that its NOT uncommon to do and that its ok? .... sorry for so many questions.

[shorty4ever15]

I wasn't specifically trying to say that you should just go up to him and say.......(lets experiment--everybody does it.) I was tryin to go more along the lines of--if you are ever in that situation again, and if you two are as close of friends as you say then it will more that likely happen again, then you should just go for it.

 

And, if he has a problem with going further than just showing stomachs, then try to bring up the whole experimentation issue. Again, don't force anything that's not mutual. Forcing something that he knows he doesn't want will only bring uncomfortability to your relationship.

 

So if that time comes again, I know it's hard but try to put your self-consciousness aside for one night. Try to get into the mindset of....what the hell. You are with a friend that you seem to "love." And, if he is a friend, he isn't going to judge you on "a little bit of body hair".

 

I hope this is more of what you were looking for. If it's not I'm sorry as I never had the oppurtunity you did. Either way I hope the best for you.

Feel free to PM if you need to talk about anything.

 

~Shorty

[Ecko809]

Hey SaSaRai,

 

Why dont you try telling him what you think? Complementing him on his features is one way to raise his self esteem and confidence. Once he knows that YOU are comfortable with him, he will probably be more open to you. Being too straightforward may not be the best route to go because being blunt might catch him off guard. Hes obviously not opposed to the idea as he let you touch him, so give it a shot when you feel the time is right. Try asking him how he felt when you had that moment together.

 

Good Luck

[SaSaRai]

i talked to my friend again, and he told me that he saw me and i was "up" (erect) and we started talkin... and he said he was "up" too when we were talking about all of this. (i didnt ask him anything else) but i wonder if he was like that when i was touching his chest? hmm.... do you think he would let me do it again next time - if he liked it and it made him "up"? Or do you think he'd avoid it to make sure nothign else happened.. ?

[shorty4ever15]

Ok,

 

I'm going to be blunt here. I'm normally not one to make posts like this, but in order to be honest with you, I just need to come out and say it. Your sending yourself in circles now. You know as well as I do that he must feel comfortable around you because most guys don't tell other guys when they are erect. And then the fact that both of you were and talked about it. HELLOOOO!!!!!

 

It sounds more to me that the only thing stopping you is yourself. YOU don't have the confidence to say...OK lets just do it. So, if you want to find out about yourself, and your friend for that matter, you need to put your self-consciousness aside. I know that is much easier said than done. But, if you don't, you are just going to be sending your mind in circles like you already are.

 

I don't know anything about your friend. I don't know much of anything about you for that matter either. I do care though, and I'm worried that you are going to miss a great chance here. I really don't think he would avoid it from what your telling me of him. It sounds like he is just as curious as you are.

 

I hope for the best. Whatever that may be.

 

~Shorty

[SaSaRai]

thanks shorty, u made a lot of sense - and actually since you have posted all that you have posted , i think im going to change myself some anyways, for the better. thank for all the advice everyone.

[Ecko809]

good luck sasarai

[shorty4ever15]

yea...what Ecko said...Good Luck!!!!

 

Fill us in as to how your doing.

 

~Shorty

[SaSaRai]

well hes coming back over this weeked (friday) and im going ot his house (saturday) and we still have our talks... so ill let ya know this weekend