How to forgive a <> ?

[missyxoxo]

I am going thru a lot of mixed feelings as I was raised a Christian and have always had a forgiving attitude towards people who have done me wrong. I have experienced a lot of relationship problems with my fiance however throughout a breakup he slept with another person. I know people shouldnt be judged by there careers however this individual is a stripper and I do look down on her, not just because of her career but her poor reputation. She is a drug user and has been with most men in my town and can be a bad person. What i mean by bad person is lie to others, steal, humiliate people on social media and physically attack people. I have had this person attack me on social media about being with then ex boyfriend (although he wasnt talking to her) and then physically attack me after he decided to reconcile the relationship. I have a restraining order and have pressed criminal charged against the girl however I hold a really bad grudge and cannot let the hurt go because i cant forgive her. The attack was brutal as i was punched repeatedly in the face several times whilst a man held me down. With the girls court mention coming up I cannot stop to wish her the worst.

 

Does anyone have any advice on forgiveness....??? And for the Christians out there can you please give me a Christian perspective as well

[lukeb]

If forgiveness was easy it wouldn't be forgiveness it would be something else. Some of your anger is misplaced and some of it is justified as I understand your story. I think there is a lot of anger towards this woman because she slept with your ex when the two of you were broken up. That is something you need to forgive your fiance for, but this is not something she ever did to you. You are not going to forgive this woman if this is a completely one sided attack on social media, or was it an escalation of events? If it was an escalation of events and you had a role in it, then there might be room for forgiveness and self improvement. There is no excuse for actual physical violence though, and sometimes you just have to cut people out of your life.

[lukeb]

The fact that she is a stripper and has a "poor reputation" have nothing to do with you and again isn't anything you need to forgive her for. The only obvious thing where I would have a great deal of difficulty forgiving is the actual violent physical assault but judging from your title I think you are having a more difficult time forgiving her for sleeping with your fiance when you were broken up. That to me seems very strange.

 

A lot would have to happen for me to forgive someone for physically assaulting me and that "a lot" would have to come from the other person.

[Seraphim]

I agree what she is has nothing to do with you. And what happened when you and your boyfriend were broken up has just as much to do with your boyfriend as it has to do with her. I can see physical assault and cyber attacking being difficult to bear though. I can understand how that would be hard to forgive. Religion is not allowed as a topic of discussion on this forum. However from one Christian person to another I would say to discuss this with your priest/minister.