twogood24u Posted December 30, 2004 Share Posted December 30, 2004 My ex is really confusing me how do u tell if they want you back or if they just want to be friends. We have been going out for 3 years living together for 2 and a half of those years and have a 8 month old son together ( read previous posts for more info) we have now been broken up for 1 month and a week. Im 23 and she is 21. We have meet up together about 3 times since this....the first time the night we had planned got sold out so we called it a night and I dropped her off at home....the second time we went out with our son for a couple hours...and the third time we had a blast. We have had many more plans to do as a family but my work has been keeping me from doing some of them. When we go out together she wont walk close to me but also not far away....when we make eye contact she will look at me for a second and then look away......also when it comes to our goodbyes they are pretty akward no hugs or anything from her just a quick goodbye and with a blink of the eye shes gone out of the car......now the last time we meet up im pretty sure I could have gotten a hug or something but I just said a quick goodbye and jumped out of her car. Also shes always bringing up things that she bought for me (like a shirt etc) or she will say oy yeah remember when we did this things like that....but nothing about the relationship or why she left etc. I also noticed when we go out shes constantly checking her cell phone. Shes also usually calling me at least every 2 days.....if not more. And text messaging me. Also she still talks to my mother and when they get to talking about me my mom will say isnt it too soon for u guys to be hanging out and the ex will say no because this time I dont want him back...or this was the last time etc etc. Now I have been playing it very confident no begging or bringing up anything to do with the 2 of us. I just go out and have fun. What do u guys think u see a chance here or is she playing me for a fool.Also I cant do the NC thing because we do have a son. Any advice on how to win her back or what to do here will be appreciated.......thnks Link to comment
Softmoonlight Posted December 30, 2004 Share Posted December 30, 2004 Personally, I think she is just making sure you keep in contact with your son and allowing him to feel that things haven't changed drastically. I wouldn't make any moves yet, I don't think she's interested and it may damage the relationship you have right now which seems to be going ok. However, if you really love her and want her back, wait a while until she realizes what a wonderful man you are once again and makes her moves = ) Link to comment
Iceman26 Posted December 30, 2004 Share Posted December 30, 2004 I dont think you can be played for a fool in this situation because you have a child together, and it is in the best interests of the child that you guys attempt to work out your problems as much as possible, if they can be worked out. I think its too early to say if she wants to get back together or not. When you guys go out, who watches your son? Maybe she is looking at the cell phone because she is worried something may happen to the baby while she is away. Do you feel that there may be another guy? Link to comment
twogood24u Posted December 30, 2004 Author Share Posted December 30, 2004 Well the weird thing is is before I wasnt there for my son I was always working etc...I spend more time with him now then I did before because I got my priorities straightened out ( of course after she left). Link to comment
twogood24u Posted December 30, 2004 Author Share Posted December 30, 2004 when we go out we bring him with us......I now an old friend of hers has wanted her real bad for a long time but she told my mom he wasnt her type she wanted someone that was a cross between me and him lol Link to comment
Iceman26 Posted December 30, 2004 Share Posted December 30, 2004 lol I wouldn't call him an "old friend" I would call him a guy that pretended to be a friend to get together with her. I say just give it time man, hang out with her some more and see where it takes you guys. Keep us posted on whats going on. Link to comment
twogood24u Posted January 3, 2005 Author Share Posted January 3, 2005 The last time I talkd to her she said she would give me a call when she got back from her vacation.........well she called me on sat. we talked for a while she told me she got back on thursday.....Is it a bit weird she didnt call me on new years??? or am i reading to much into it ?? Link to comment
Iceman26 Posted January 4, 2005 Share Posted January 4, 2005 It is odd she didn't call you on New Years, but I wouldn't think too much of it. Just let it go and dont even bring it up. Link to comment
twogood24u Posted January 12, 2005 Author Share Posted January 12, 2005 well I have now been out with her a bit more we have met up for breakfast a few times, i have taking her shopping and out for lunch a nd we have a day planned for just the two of us (babysitter for the son) in Feb. Now she definitely seems like she has warmed up not too much akwardness anymore. Our relationship has not come up once ( im smart enough to let her bring it up if she wants-she left me) She will now walk closer to me and sit beside me but nothing physical at all no hugs or nothing. Now im the one thats always asking her to do things ie. breakfast shopping etc. although she will call me...am i chasing after her to much or what? She had some good reasons for leaving me and im just trying to show her that I have changed. Anyone have some advice or input here anything wil help ( also keep in mind nc will not work to well cause we have a son I pick up oncea week) Link to comment
Iceman26 Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 Just keep doing what you are doing man, that is all you really can do. Give it some time. Link to comment
clodhopper Posted January 15, 2005 Share Posted January 15, 2005 It honestly sounds like you're doing well. Just getting the chance to hang out with her is great. I'm glad that you're able to do that and not bring up your relationship - you should be proud of yourself for being strong. I would suggest just keep doing what you're doing - as you said it seems like she's warming up to things and isn't so awkward. Good luck Link to comment
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