His attitude and approach changed overnite.

[jbutterfly2020]

Hi,

 

I feel like a child asking this question but I am lost with what happened to me today. I should have known better, but of course I chose to believe it could be different this time. I guess there are the reasons for what happens.

 

There was this guy at work, he has been there about a month. He is awesome and we got along really good. He would come to my area to talk to me for long periods of time. I am attracted to him but I have kept those feelings inside and just acted with him as I do with other guys on the job.

 

Well a few days ago he asked if I was doing anything for New Years and if I wanted to hang with him. I have plans so I told him what they were. I am hanging with my group and going to some parties.

 

Well today out of nowhere, he says he has a rule against dating the under 21.(He is 26 by the way). I said thats cool, the age can make a difference sometimes. We were not on the relationship subject so this came out really awkward when he said it.

 

Then, later he asks if I could help him with problems. He says, "I have this new girlfriend that I have been seeing for a few weeks now. But my ex, who I was crazy for, called me back up. "

 

This threw me for a loop again. I just smiled and said going back to an ex is crazy so just have fun with the new girl.

 

 

So this guy goes from being interested to trying to be "just friends" with me?

 

Ahh I need to stay away from relationships these days.

[sisterlynch]

You can't put your hopes on other people. People make mistakes, you can't blame yourself for being the wrong age or what ever, for some people there is no right age, because they are always seeing the glass as half empty instead of half full. I would treat him like a friend, then when you are older, then you can be better acquainted, but it is hard for him to know what he wants right now...he sounds like he really has his hands full.

[striderhiryu81]

I think he may just be trying to play down the fact that he asked you out and you were forced to reject him. Not that you did it because you aren't interested, but because you had other plans... he is obviously looking past that though.

 

I think maybe his ego is hurt and thats why he is coming to you with these "problems" all of a sudden.

 

I don't think that he has a girlfriend...maybe just a girl that he is seeing on occasion. Shouldn't he have plans with her for New Years Eve...not a girl from work (if she is in fact, his girlfriend)?

 

If you like him I would just flirt with him and see if he will come around again. Don't put too much stock in it though. I really think he is bluffing, but of course you'll have to discern if he is or not through your interactions since you are the one actually living this situation.

 

Good luck with understanding whats going on. I hope my take helps.

[Queen_Midas]

To me it sounds like he's just making this all up, to act as if he never liked u cos he's a bit embarrassed.. This is something I considered doing in reaction to my current crush not giving me any reply when I asked him out.. then again I can't judge everyone by my book..but I think that's what he's up to.. If you like him maybe ask him for a drink, as friends.

 

QM.

[Starkitty]

I think he likes/liked you, but feels abit rejected. He didn't think this through very well because if he has a new girlfriend and an ex that wants him back why did he ask you out a few days ago? and why have this new dating over 21 rule if hes already dating? lol.

 

Do you feel the same? Maybe you could drop some hints and see if he dumps his new girlfriend over night

[Cadence308]

I agree with everyone else. Sounds like he likes you and his ego got hurt when you were forced to reject him due to other plans. Since you have been interested, why didn't you ask him to join you and your other friends on New Year's? Also, couples usually like to spend New Year's together, so the likelihood that he has a girlfriend is slim to none being that he already asked you out for New Year's.

 

I would just flirt with him. Maybe ask him if he has plans for New Year's and invite him to join you and your friends.

[jbutterfly2020]

Thanks for all your help everyone. I can't bring him along because it will be me and my close girl friends since we didn't hang out hardly ever this semester. I do understand how that hurt his ego but there are a million other times we could hang out and I was not rude about it.

 

I thought he would be very awesome to date but now maybe I should just keep him at arms length and keep enjoying that.

 

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!