whats it all for?

[never again]

Everyone i know has at least once said how great of a person i am. That i have a wonderful personality, and that i'm funny, careing, thoughtful, and trustworthy. But this just isnt good enough for me to find anyone special. I know i'm ALOT different then other girls. And i don't know if its high standards or not, to want a guy who is respectful, responsible, and loving enough to treat me the way i need to be treated. I get walked all over all of the time and i don't understand why. It's like people have no respect for me from the get-go and they figure i have no feelings. People are quick to forget about me first. They are quick to give me the shaft over other people. And i'm pretty damn sure i don't deserve any of it, but i get it anyways. And it doesn't help any matters of mine. I care about everyone. But i'm never even on anyones priority list. I'm alwys the last of their concerns.

 

I know i'm depressed. And i tried treatment but i couldn't stay with it. And i don't receive help from anyone to try and improve myself. I should be helping my father with something right now but instead i'm sitting here crying and thinking about suicide because i feel hopeless. He'll get made and think i'm worthless. I certainly feel that way. Whatever i do won't be appreciated anyways. I know one day my time will come where things will turn around. Or at least i'll have a chance, but i'll be dead by then. I'd be dead inside like i almost feel. I don't wanna care for anyone anymore. I don't to give it my all and not it being good enough, i just want to do nothing. I'd rather be dead.

[lookingformyredangel]

I'm sure lots of people say this but I know what you are going through and really don't give up on yourself. First of all, guys are not everything and most of the time they can't see something wonderful right in front of their face. A lot of them don't realize it until it's too late or they just don't care. Try not to get bent out of shape about it cause I know this forsure, guys are definitely not everything and if you make them everything it just makes things worse.

You sound like a wonderful person and shouldn't be putting yourself down. Do Not feel like youi are worthless cause no one is. And if you are trying your best at anything thats all anyone can ask for. You can't do better than your best so why say it's not good enough. TRy and hold on. It's hard I know but the worlds not always as crappy as it seems. and suicide is not the answer. It doesn't make anything work out or better. It just means your gone and there is no chance for things to improve. It means you are no longer there for the people who do care about you (and there are some I'm sure).

If you need anything or whatever, you can pm me. please pulll that head up and wipe those tears. I wish you the best of luck and I shall be thinking of you

 

-Emma

[Roasted Carrots]

I know it doesn't seem like it, but a lot of people have been where you are -including me. And you may get tired of hearing this, but suicide is not the answer it is a "permanent solution to a temporary problem" as they say.

 

You are a wonderful person and you acknowledge that. Start focusing on everything you do right instead of everything that goes wrong. "Whoever said sunshine is pure happiness has never danced in the rain."

 

Life can suck sometimes, I know. But the key to true happiness is to savor those little sunshines and to build upon them. Have you ever tried keeping a journal, or writing poetry? Even if you're not much of a "writer", it helps to express your feelings out on paper.

 

Don't give up on finding the right treatment plan. There are new medications and new theropies coming out ever day, and eventually, you and your doctors will find the right meds and dosage for you. You just have to keep an open mind and keep chugging.

 

Remember to stay away from people who bring you down - who needs jerky guys who treat you like a doormat? Leave the relationship if you start feeling like you deserve better.

 

I hope I helped. Things will get better in time, you just have to be strong. We're here if you need us.

 

Take care!

[hazlcha]

You know the story about the ugly duckling? Maybe it's time you started hanging out with your fellow swans. No, your standards are right where they should be. You deserve respect. I hope you will not stop until you have found them.

[ShySoul]

I know how you feel. It's not easy and at times you feel like giving up. All your efforts seem to go unappreciated. Your nice to everyone but end up getting taken advantage of. Everyone says what a great person you are but they never really take the time to know you or appreciate everything you do for others. I feel the same way. I'm very different then most people I know. I don't feel like I'm a priority to most people. You don't deserve it and it isn't fair. But life isn't always fair and some of us have it harder than others. But eventually things get better. There will be a rainbow after the rain, it just takes time and patience to get there. Eventually you'll find the happiness your looking for, and when you do it will be wonderful. All the hurt will have been worth it as you will feel good about yourself and will find someone who does understand and appreciate you.

 

Your standards are not high, there are just right. There are respectful, responsible, loving guys out there looking for girls just like you. It's just a matter of shifting through all the bad guys to find that one special jewel. The important thing is to be happy with yourself. Don't let others opinions get you down. Know that you are a great person, a special person who deserves the best. Your not worthless. In fact, you sound like you are a very special person who will do great things in life. No matter how dead you feel inside, suicide isn't the answer. The hardest thing about life is living it. But those who endure the hardships that life places in front of them are the strongest people.

 

You will find happiness, believe in yourslef and have hope. And if you want to talk, you can always PM me.