how do I change my ways

[kandi13]

I need help. I met this guy over the summer, and we started out as friends. Then we went out. I loved him so much I could have wrote a million page book explaining how much he meant to me and he still wouldnt have a glimpse of how much he really did. He was the best to me, but I screwed up with him. He was moving, and I was so sad. I couldnt eat sleep nothing. He ended up dumping me. I was heartbroken. We started to fight so much, and i usually started it. Well he moved, and we went out again. This time it didnt feel real i dont know if it was becuz I hardly saw him, or if he didnt love me like he use to. So he ended up breaking up with me again, and said to me lets be friends. Why was he doing this.... I finally found out why. I was in my lil world, I treated him so bad. It was horrible, I hurt him so much. He didnt wanna be friends no more, I was such a bit*h to him. Somedays he would go in his room and lock himself up in there upset becuz of me. He really did luv me. I told him I changed, and he gave me another chance to prove I did, well a few weeks pasted and we didnt fight....so he asked me out. I said yes and it went so great for 3 weeks. But he dumped me again. I didnt know why, i treated him so good.....then i found out why.....i didnt trust him....I asked him all these questions like if he loved me and if he was playin me....so he broke it off.....then we started to fight, and he ended up hating me.....I got him abck as a friend but hes givin me 1 more chance to prove i changed and that Im not a bitch...I dont mean to be a bitch it just happens please if anyone has advice help me out cuz if I lose him again Im afraid what ill do

thanks

Kandi

[panda]

i dont think u sound like a bitch. it sounds like ur just insecure because of how many times he's finished with u and the amount of love u feel for him makes u devasted at the thought of losing him. u ask him how he feels over and over and give him so much attention coz deep down ur scared he'll end it again. try and play it cool. i know its hard to do but it does help. if u just act as though ur really happy and content doing stuff without him for a while and pretend he isnt everything to u then he'll feel less smothered. and then it'll become more equal between u. he will love u as much as u love him and he will make u feel more secure. i might be reading it wrongly but i think u just need to take a step back and try not to focus too much on him. men are weird...if u show them less attention then they want u more and treat u better, but if ur totally in love with them and treat them like princes they take u for granted and feel too smothered and end up finishing it. just relax...it sounds like he does want to make it work and he's still part of ur life so chill and things will come together in the end. good luck, hope i was of some help.