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It is not getting any easier.

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Hello there i posted here once before about 3 weeks ago. A quick backround: I was with the the same girl for a little over five years. We built our lives around each other. We always had a great relationship. I was in love with her so much. Anyway our communication toward the end was a little off. I work full time and started going back to school full time and working. We really didnt get to spend to much quality time togethet. I was making an effort to spend time with her but it just wasnt enough. I would take days off of work and go hiking or we would go pick apples. Little things like that. When she broke up with me i was devistated. It was out of the blue. She called me the night we were supposed to go out to eat and told me that she needed to talk to me. I knew right then what was going to happen. I did the initial freak out things tried to convince her that she was making a mistake. But in the end I knew i couldnt change her mind, I love her to much to not give her what she needs right now. She told me that she wasnt happy and that she needed to change something in her life. She has been very busy with school as she is trying to get into grad school right now and is very focused. She is at a major croosroad in her life. I just dont know though. Maybe she wanted me to propose to her maybe she wanted a lot of things. I just dont know. One week after she broke up with me we went to a concert. She brought me out to dinner and then we went to the bar afterwards. She looked me in the eye grabbed my hand and told me that she had a really good time tonight and thanked me. Then she told me that we didnt know what was going to happen and that we dont know anything right now. These things are kind of screwing with me a little. It leaves a little hope there. 2 days we had a talk. I am supposed to go to italy for new years and i wasnt going to go because i wanted to be with her. She told me Quote " We have been together to long for you to miss this trip for one night. We are to strong for that" and then she made me promise her that i would come to her house for christmas this year, which she was very adiment about. I just dont know what to think of all this, and on top if it all she wants to hang out before christmas. she said that she cant talk to me know because she needs to do well on her exams. I just dont know about all this i am ver hurt and was planning to mary this girl. Any advice would be a great help

Sincerly J.D

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sometimes, even in what seem to be the best of relationships...as time goes by you grow in two different directions.


More than likely, your communication was always a bit off...more on her end than yours...and then towards the end, when you had less time to spend with her...she became even more closed off until she made her choice to leave.


She has things she wants to pursue, and the next level of commitment to you wasn't in that plan...so don't concern yourself that she was waiting for a ring...if anything...she was trying to figure out for quit some time how to tell you she wanted to get her education...


it isn't that she doesn't still care abut you...but I think it has turned more into a friendship...for now anyway...let her puruse her dream of an education...don't put your life on hold for her (go to italy)...find something you want to pursue (besides her)....and see if life brings you back together or not...


if not...you have 5 years of wondful memories...

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