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thoughts during sex


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i think i'm ready to have sex but i'm totally not sure at the same time. i mean, i know its something that i want to do right now, but having someone seeing me naked makes me really uncomfortable... its not like i'm 400 lbs overweight or anything. i'm a model so i'm totally comfortable in front of camera, but when its with another person and its all quiet i get so nervous and stuff... he respects the fact that i'm still a virgin and i totally love him for that, but we havent known each other for a very long time which i dont really think matters cuz we just get along so well. what i really want to kno, and i've never been able to ask anyone, is what goes on in a man's head when he's having sex? especially with someone who's never done it before. what's he thinking?

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why does it matter what he thinks during sex as an influence as to if you are going to do it or not?

 

My personal opinion, if you have any doubts whatsoever, you should hold off. Have your first encounter with someone you know for sure genuinely cares about you, and how you feel....not just with some guy you have been dating for a while because it seems like you are at an age where you should have done it by now.

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I lost my virginity a few months ago to a guy that I hadn't dated for very long. He knew that I was a virgin and wanted to remain one when we first started dating, but lust got in the way and one thing led to another.

 

The day after, I was a little emotional about it, but he comforted me and I got to the point where I was okay with it. Then we broke up. We had the perfect relationship, had talked about marriage and having kids, everything. We talked about how many kids we were going to have one day, and the next day it was over.

 

My point is that no matter how happy you are right now, you still have to understand that there's a chance you will break up. You have to consider how it would make you feel if you did this, and then broke up later on. Losing your virginity to someone is a big deal. It's something that you can never get back.

 

My advice is not to do it. I wish that I hadn't. It's caused me a lot of guilt and a lot of pain. When you have sex with someone, the emotional bond grows. A lot of relationships aren't ready for the pressure that comes with that. Mine wasn't. Now I have to live with the fact that I will never be the same again.

 

In the end, it's not worth it. The emotions you go through, and the pain that you experience are too overwhelming. It's a whole lot of unnecessary grief.

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This day in age, VERY few girls remain with one man their entire sexual life. I personally don't think this is a bad thing, as part of getting comfortable with yourself sexually comes with experiencing the act of sex with another person. Whomever disagrees has that right, but this particular post is my opinion.

 

What you have to think is not "will I be with him forever?" as your deciding factor... You're probably not going to be. What you should think is:

 

Does he make me feel happy and comfortable when I am with him?

Do I trust him and feel safe with him?

Years from now, when we are no longer together, will I be able to look back and smile when I think about our relationship?

 

I'm not with my "first" but I will never forget him and I feel what we shared enhanced my life. Since then every intimate relationship I have been in strengthened me, and now that I feel like I am with "the one" I'd like to spend the rest of my life with, I am glad for the experiences I've had. It helps me feel comfortable and good about myself, and I'm confident in what I want in a partner.

 

Do what feels right in your heart but realize what is most likely going to happen is you won't be together forever and you'll have to live with this experience. This can be a totally wonderful and positive experience.

 

Above all, be safe.

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What do we think about.... I love this girl so much and I feel so very close to her right now, well is she enjoying what I'm doing? think unsexy thoughts think unsexy thoughts.

 

"I don't say anything, I'm just being quietly grateful" Billy Connolly

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