Should this be enough?

[Beto]

Hi there,

 

I would appreciate your advice.

This is the story: I broke up with my now ex in last September; I loved her a lot but we were constantly fighting; although we had everything to work, the fact is she was very stressed.

In October, I met a girl and we started dating. This girl is very "cool" and unlike my ex, she is very pragmatic, with a personality very similar to mine. The doubt here is: with my new girl, things (physically speaking) are ok but it's nothing compared with the complicity and attraction I feel for my ex. Since the first day, we (me and ex) had a strong connection/attraction and complicity.

 

Is it possible one day I could feel for my new girl the same attraction I feel for my ex? Or this chemistry will never happen between us?

And what about my ex? I steel think on her and feel very attracted on her, but I'm afraid if we got back together the stress may possible continue. On the other hand, I'm afraid of loosing this new girl. Despite the attraction and complicity, is very enjoyable to be and talk to her. Should this be enough?

 

Thanks.

[ticklebug]

Beto

 

it isn't fair to this new girl that you are comparing your relationship with the one you had with your ex. They are two different people, of course the feelings are going to be different.

 

No, you won't ever have the SAME thing...as I said, she isn't the SAME person...you need to get over your feelings for your ex and put yourself fully into this new relationship...and if you can't care for this new girl in the manner she deserves - you need to re evaluate if you are ready to even BE in a relationship with someone new.

[heyguys]

Well I think my es, see I said ex, bf was and is the same as you. We have, since the first day been passionatley attracted to eacohther, this natural attraction I guess. We fell in love, deep. We broke up after 2 years. That lasted for a year, I guess he went thru what you did. He was dating girls and they were cool and fun, but that "chemistry" that "attraction" really wasnt there like it was between is. We got back together a year later, and have been dating for a year again. But we too fought a lot, and not surprisingly we still do. SO if you are worried that you will fight alot with your ex who you still have feeligns and are attracted to, I can guarantee you gus will fight again. We are and he broke it off a week ago . My adice is that don not get back with your ex gf just because you guys are so "into eachother" if you cant hadnle the heat that'll arise. I am very hurt and disspointed my bf gave up on us again. SO be careful I guess. ANd maybe this new girl could turn out to be pretty great in time. Im sure the feelings you have for ur ex are not really letting u get close to the new girl...hope this helps =) By the way, I still love my ex like I have since day one and him too....but the fighting, grrr

[mcpiper]

I say give it time. Be honest with the both of them and if possible all should date other people. Maybe in time dating will show which one you really want to be with. As far as the fighting we all have bad days but unless it's really worth the resentment of the fight don't. ;o}