Can we fall twice? [longish]

[ForAnother]

I'd suppose I'd put this post here but I am not so sure.

 

My current gf and I have been dating about 3 weeks I suppose.. (maybe 4 I dunno not keeping count). Before her I dated a girl of 1 year. My ex and I had sex the second week we were dating (in fact I took her virginity). My ex was also my first love, and pretty much the first time I ever fell (I dated before, but didn't take the dive cuz I didn't spend enough time with them).

 

Basically what I want to ask is, will I fall again? and why am I not as interested in this new one of 1 month (I been broken from my ex for 2 months now, and have been on NC for each of our own benefits).

 

First of all I am thinking maybe I haven't fallen for this new one because, I hadn't really considered dating seriously until my ex. I decided that I would give it my all, and that I wanted to have a great relationship. So I would drive down, bring her flowers... the whole deal (also I was in High school). I just fell with her..

 

Secondly, I think the sex was also a whole thing to our relationship... the sex we had was STUNNING... just breathtaking. I have had sex with 3 other girls, and she was just... amazing. I have yet to have sex with my current, which I am so happy because we are taking it slow, something I have never done before.

 

Third, I had to drive 45 min to see my ex. Currently I am in college, and my gf is one floor above me, so if I wanna see her I can just go up and say "hey." I think some of the thrill is gone.

 

The whole thing is, is that I share just about everything with my current gf. I mean everything, we have pretty much similiar views which is nice. We do have dissagreements and we always laugh about things. I find myself physically much more attracted to her, and her personality (i think). I did like the very defensive personality of my ex, however I think that it was the demise of our relationship. This girl isn't defensive at all, and is so laid back just like I am.

 

I guess I can't figure out what made me love my ex so fast? Was it just infatuation? Can you fall again once you fell SO HARD your first time? I just hope that it happens again.

 

I still think about my ex quite a bit (perhaps I am not over her?). I have been tempted to call a few times, but I know its best that I don't... so I haven't. I really am mad at her as she is angry at me. I wanna apologize, but I know if I do she's gonna be a jerk just like always. Maybe I am hanging onto something that I have to let go... but it just won't leave my mind.

 

I really do like my current alot... I think we will have a long relationship.. but I am scared.

 

ForAnother

[Mun]

Hi there,

I think the things you are saying about the thrill being gone and such are very interesting. This girl is more available to you than your ex and so it feels as if things are just too easy-and not as exciting.

 

I believe it is very possible to fall in love again and fall hard just like before. Maybe you are just not completely over your ex and that's why you aren't feeling as close to this new girl as you should. It was just a month in between girls... that's not very much time at all. The good thing is that you are taking things slow.

 

It's very smart of you to note that your new girlfriend is easier to get along with than your ex. You have things in common, but enough things are different so that it's not boring. To me this sounds like an ideal relationship because you are also good friends.

[ForAnother]

yeah we are fantastic friends, something my ex and I were not. I appreciate what you have said Muneca. I suppose the thrill will come again, with time and experience. But I want it to happen with this new girl, cuz she is just great, and I like her alot.

 

ForAnother