My BF Fantasises having sex with other guys

[swordman]

Lately my boyfriend fantasises having sex with other guys, he admitted to me. When he was younger, he fooled around a lot. He said he kinda miss it--having one night stand. I think he misses the excitement from the one night stand. We agree to have a monogramous relationship. Somehow, the fantasy has been bothering him recently and often. He said he loves me and doesn't want to do something he will regret, but doesn't know what causes it and how to get rid of the fantasy. He and I have pretty good sex life, although I am not his type by look. His desire for man is dark skin and mascular, but I am just average--147lbs, 6', medium skin with dark hair and good chest. I don't have killer ab or such thing. I am not that urgly; in fact I have a sense of style. People always make a compliment on how I dress. We get along so well and compromise to each other pretty much. Why has this problem happened in our love life? What can we do to solve the issue? Please share your opinion ahd help. I would really appreciate your help.

[Cecil de Volange]

I think your boyfriend is having a freudian moment...sometimes if the person is in a lot of stress the unconscious mind can have unexplained thoughts just pop up in their mind, especially eccentric fantasy...try to talk to him more, also looks does not matter, its the person from within that matter...trust me. Humor overshadows ugliness....and all that personality ish.

[SaSaRai]

Well , if you think he's goign to go and turn gay on you then dont worry because it is normal for a guy to think about things like that. I woulndt really worry about it unless he decides that he wants to go the other way completely and forget about you and go gay on you. IT is pretty normal actually for guys to think of that if you have seen surveys. You can read about it on link removed

[swordman]

Cecil de Volange, you ar probably right about that. He get stressful easiy, but never let me know. I tried to encourage him to share with me. In the past 9 months, he broke up wit me once because he said I caused him depression. The fact was it wasn't me. He ihas been going through tough time at work and debts and wanted to eliminate any source of stress in his life. He saw me as one of those souces too. Kinda like defended himself. A week later he came to ask me back. He said he didn't think thing straight. I love this man so much, so I get back with him. Everything seems fine to me, except the sexual life. There are good and bad times.

If it because he doen't know what he wants, what should I do to help him?

[Cecil de Volange]

honestly, their is nothing you can do to help him, if you have supported him with all his problems that is enough. Also you say he has a debt thing problem , my advice don't make subjective decisions , but make the objective decisions . I know you love him, but think for a moment...ask yourself...will I be happy for the rest of my life with him? can he truly support me even though he has a debt problem?Is he immature?does he have all the qualities I want? and etc. To me it doesn't look like he knows what he wants. Your a sweet and bright person. Make the right decision.

 

Ps. "no matter how much you love the person, and you know your unhappy and not compatible, you have to let them go."