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So it's been a while since I last wrote anything about my old relationship, so i guess that's a good thing. I'm kinda down though, but I guess it's because I've been thinking about the holidays and being alone again. My favorite time of the year and I have no one to share it with.


It's really hard though, because of course, like fate is trying to shove everything in my face, christmas has to be our anniversary. Well, not anymore, but it would've been. It's sad too, because it reminds me of the puppy I got her last year that I haven't seen in so long. I hope he's doing well.


It seems so hard to leave everything behind, and my heart continues to think about her when my brain does not. I truly miss her and still love her, but I guess after so many months I have learned to ignore these feelings. A part of me really wants to see her and find out how she's been, but then reality steps in to remind me that it is pointless since obviously we aren't friends. Sucks going from "significant other" to nothing.


The saddest part of all this is that I have lost my interest in other women. Its been almost five months now and yet I still find myself uninterested in women. I meet so many, and know that I could get with them, but I always find myself declining them an opportunity. Maybe I'm just afraid to get hurt again, or maybe I'm really not interested.


I dont know what's going to happen when I go home for christmas. We both have the same circle of friends and I dont see how I will be able to hang out with them anymore. I dont want to lose them as my friends, but I dont want to take the chance of running into her and my feelings coming back that I have spent so long to overcome. I'm hoping my friends will understand and try to hang out with both of us at separate times. I know I'm going to lose them though, but I guess that's a price to pay for dating someone; taking the chance of losing more than just a gf/bf.


Sorry for the length, or even the content, I just felt like venting for a bit. I'm down, and writing makes me feel better. it really is a good release, and I'm glad this site is here, because it's good to know there are people all over the world feeling like you are, less being specific to their own situation. Good luck to everyone, God bless, and feel free to leave comments, or anything else.



"Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow."

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Well I am sure that will be awkward for the both of you as well as your friends. Just try to go on with things as you normally would. Don't avoid places or events because you know she will be there. Cutting off all contact with an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend is tough but it gets easier with time and distraction.


Even after 2 years of being broken up, I still want to check up on my old boyfriend. But my mind tells me that my heart would want more than just a simple conversation, so I refrain from calling him.

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Hey it sounds like you have had a really tough time handling the break up of your ex, but my opinion you sound like a really nice guy and your ex doesnt know what she has lost and there are not many guys like you out there.

I know the feelin when you see an ex that you still really care about it hurts more than anything, but you have come this far and you are strong, you dont need her to be happy! its her loss!! Think of it like it has made you stronger.

I broke up wiv one of my ex's about 7 months ago and nothing will stop me thinkin how special he was and how much i miss him, but at the end of the day it wasn't ment to be im not going to keep messing my life up just because of him.

If your mates are true friends they will completely understand where you are coming from, they should meet you and your ex at separate times i think that would be for the best.

If you do happen to see your ex just think about what she has lost and act really happy and dont show she is getting to you, you will find someone else and you will wonder why you wasted so much time over someone who wasnt worth it. And she isnt worth it you CAN do better and you will when the time is right. Be strong and keep your chin up!! hope that helped abit. good luck x

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