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Please tell me what you think. I need help.

John Ashton

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Hey, I have been with my girlfriend for about 1 year and 3 months now. I have been thinking about if we should break up.

Me and my girlfriend have been through allot and told each other our secrets for about 4 month we we're both in allot of pain over

something she stupid had done when she was just starting high school. I am the only person who knows and I would never betray

that trust. But we got through it after the best part of a year. Over the past few months I have found myself thinking about other

women and in some instances even flirting. We are both young, both 16. The first year was brilliant, we loved each other very much

and spent allot of time together, but I begin to wonder now "was it too much too soon?" as I am losing interest in our relationship.

She has been through a history of self harm and I hate the thought of her crying alone or doing anything stupid like self harm or even

suicide. Her family are horrible, not one of them care about her if there isn't anything in it for them and I think that before long I will

end up pasting her dad around the street. Her father has attacked her over 5 times in the past year.

We have had sex more times than I can count but I am even losing interest in that.

It want her to be safe and okay always but I just wanting out of the relationship and to be by myself and free. She is still very loving of me

and is still very happy in the relationship. Also my family all really love her and have strong bonds with her and her with them, she love being part of the family here and they all love her, I'd hate to take that away from her as she can't depend on her own.

Please help in anyway that you can.

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I understand that you care for her and don't want to hurt her. That's natural, and that's good.


But, you are obviously growing bored of the relationship. If you stay in it purely for her sake, without wanting it for yourself, you will eventually start to resent her. And, sooner or later, you will do something like cheating on her, and probably hurt her even more than you would by splitting up now.


I'm not saying you should split up tonight. Take your time to think about it, and try to decide whether there is any chance you could get interested in her again (not just sexually, in every way), and whether there is any way you could "be yourself" while still being with her.


If the answer is no, then it probably would be better if you split up nicely. Like I say, no need to rush into a decision, though.

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Thankyou I will take everything you have said into consideration and make a decision, thanks again.

I think that it's mostly because she is my FIRST proper relationship but I don't want to settle down, I am still only 16

and I have to have experiences and do stupid things that I tell of way down the line. It feels like it's a pitty that we

got together so early because I would probably like to settle down with her many years from now, but it would seem

I can't do both. I know it sounds selfish.

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Well, you only live once. I would (if i were you), possibly just try taking a break, from her. If after to long you find yourself missing her, just stay with her explain how you feel about it and she'll understand to a degree but most likely will still be hurt by it, explaining it to her and being honest is better than being bland and randomly breaking it off.... but that's my 2 cents.


I wish you good luck in your youth, your gonna need it!

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