HELP!!! ... I need your opinions!!

[hard-drive]

I need help!!!

 

I have been going out with my girlfriend for just over 1 and a half years now. We have good relationship and a healthy sex life. A couple of years ago my girlfriend went over to Canada for a year on exchange and met many friends, which she still is in contact with today. I have no problem with that, as i myself have lived abroad and have many friends which i keep in contact with. The other day she told me that her one friend from canada [an italian] was going to come to SA in 2 months to visit. Thats great i said, i'd like to meet him.

But here is where i'm uncertain..... She told me that she wants me to meet him, but for the two weeks that he's here, she doesn't want me to go out with them, as much as i would with any of her other friends...because she says that they have a very close relationship...not physical [she says] just "hugging and hanging in each other."

 

I was a bit off -put by this...not because of the fact that she has a very "contact" relationship with him [coz she is a very physical person], but becuase she doesn't want me there. I asked her why....and she replied that it was becuase she didn't want me to be jelous [i'm not really a jelous type..but i can be a little in some situations i suppose] and becuase he can't speak English..so they'll talk in French..which i can't speak [unfortunately]

 

I guess what i'm trying to say / ask is : She has told me that she did like him [back in the day] but didn't do anything because he was very superficial. and she says that she wants to be alone with him, because otherwise she'll not beable to "act herself" ????

now i don't think that she is anybody else with me, i think she will just feel like a translator ?!

 

Am i being over jelous / worried, or is there something that i should worry about? I know it sounds silly to ask you this, but any other opinion will be much appreciated!

 

Sorry for the long post.... hope i can trust you ppl to give me your honest views.

[giggirl]

honesty huh, i'll try

 

but I think from your story that things sound kind of fishy and i know it's

hard but you have to tell her how you feel

 

maybe she will respect the fact that your uncomfortable with her being alone with the guy and just kick it with him half the time he's there

 

I dont know but it always helps to talk about it to the significant other

 

and make sure she knows how you feel about her before she takes off to have fun with this guy

 

sorry not a very good advice giver but I hope it works out and

good luck

[magpie]

i dont think that i could deal with that. ive found that its easy for people to be pursuaded by temptation. that they may honestly love their partner, but when it comes to the moment, find it difficult or impossible to stay faithful. anyhow, im rather jealous. i would feel horrible the duration of the other persons visit, constatly wondering what my partner were doing. if your girlfriend respects you and loves you, she will respect your wishes and not act in a manner that would be offensive to you if you WERE there, and would not ask for time alone with another so that she may act in a manner contrary to what you would like to see.

[studawgs]

Dude, your girl is definitely planning on hooking up with him. It's so obvious. I mean, you been with her for a year and a half, and if she loves you, she would have nothing to hide. She probably hooked up with him when she was gone and kept in touch thinking it's ok because he's far away. Now he's coming back to visit and she doesn't want you there? That's totally shady, totally unfaithful, and totally not right on your girl's part. Ask your girl if she mentioned to him about you? See what she says. If she's with you, and she wants to be with you, he would have no affect on her or your relationship and she could care less if she didn't see him or speak to him ever. She's totally planning on hooking up with him and her to mention that you may get jealous or her not acting herself if you were there, tell you that she's uncomfortable and not confident in you in a relationship way. Get rid of the girl or put your foot down and tell it to her straight. If my girl ever did that to me, I would say to her, if you loved me, you would have me there, and if you loved me, he woudn't be that much of a factor if you saw him or not.