drahcir Posted October 31, 2004 Share Posted October 31, 2004 One thing that has really hurt me is that when I was in high school, lots of students (not everyone) accused me of being gay, in that they honestly believed I was a homosexual when I was not one. Its not like they were saying I was "gay" meaning I am stupid, like some people say a stupid person is "dumb".....they honestly thought i really was gay, and a few of them (not many) thought I had a gay crush on them. I would tell them repeatly I wasn't gay, but it took several years for them to actually believe me that I really wasn't gay. I would ask them why they thought I was gay, and they told me I have a "gay look"....supposedly my face was the face of someone who was gay.......they really meant this....because there were times when i went up to strangers who i completely didn't know and they immediately accused me of being gay based on how i look (my face) even though i exhibited no "gay" behaviour. ANyway, I was really hurt by all the people who accused me of being gay when I wasn't gay and I WANT TO KNOW IF THERE IS ANYONE ELSE WHO WAS FALSLY ACCUSED OF BEING GAY.....IF THERE IS, PLEASE TELL ME BECAUSE I HAVE NEVER MET ANYONE ELSE WHO HAS BEEN FALSLY ACCUSED OF BEING GAY....like not a one or twice occurrence....like on regular basis for years and years people accusing you of being gay when you are not gay?? Anyone share that???? Link to comment
ReadyorNot Posted October 31, 2004 Share Posted October 31, 2004 One of my good guy friends from Highschool was falsly accused of this... It was really dpressing him..... and he started acting weird... I mean everyone at school harassed him about it.. and he was so embarrassed to be in the football locker room because guys would get all weird around him and say that they didnt want to get changed in front of him because he would be looking.. but he wasnt... I had a long chat with him one day and he said he thought maybe he was gay.... He use to tell me how he cant wait to get married to a wonderful woman and have tons of kids..... He experimented with a guy.. and get this... the guy was the most popular guy on the football team....I couldnt believe it when I heard it...he didnt want anyone to know of course... Anyway, my guy friend is in fact gay.... but I do not think he really is happy being gay.... He has sex with WAY to many guys and he is just not happy when I talk to him and he is in a relationship that he cant get out... the guy is totally nice though so he isnt in any danger.. Link to comment
Tom_Bombadil Posted October 31, 2004 Share Posted October 31, 2004 Back in middle school I had a friend who was assumed to be gay by many people. His mannerisms had even given me the suspicion that he might have been gay, but I really didn't care (it turns out he actually wasn't after all). The other classmates were rather cruel to him because of it. A couple of our gym teachers had even made some derogatory remarks about him. They were soon fired. People would see us hanging out and chit-chatting between classes, so they figured that I was gay too. Just remember that studies have shown that many homophobic people behave the way they do because they are unsure of their own sexuality. Link to comment
MojoPin Posted October 31, 2004 Share Posted October 31, 2004 whoa dude calm down youre obviously very upset by this, the people who repeatedly accused you of being gay at school were obviously very ignorant, dont let there stupidy affect your life, many girls i know seem to find gay guys attractive so even if you do look gay its not that bad. maybe if you really need to do something about this you could change your image, if you change your apperance in some way you probably wont fit peoples stereotype image of a gay person. Link to comment
Chevelle89 Posted October 31, 2004 Share Posted October 31, 2004 some people think im gay...idk know why though. i talk ''normal''. i dress pretty normal-jeans,t shirt, sweatshirt. i dont look gay...i think, but my face makes me look a lil younger. but no one ever thinks im younger than my real age...prob caus im 6'1''. but yea, it does get annoying when people think youre gay. just get a gf or something. then they won think youre gay. i know thats really not the way you should solve things, but itll make the people shut up, you know. Link to comment
ayekasong Posted October 31, 2004 Share Posted October 31, 2004 I found out a good friend of mine was gay last year. I had no idea and she couldn't believe I didn't have a clue. It's not like she was walking around with "I am a lesbian" plastered on her forhead. You cannot tell a person's sexual preference by the way they look. I know people who have be falsely accused of this too, and I'm really not sure why people find it fun to torment others about this. Many homosexuals already deal with enough problems, that doing things like this only adds to it. In university, people didn't openly accuse me of being a lesbian, but the rumors got back to me. All because I hung out with a group of girls and one of the girls had a period of time where she was confused about her sexuality. She turned out to be straight. Yet, the whole lot of us were lesbians in everyone's eyes. I think people just enjoy spreading rumors. I've heard rumors about me regarding a lot of other things as well. As for the people accusing you of being gay, as hard as it may be, try to let it roll off of your shoulders. They just want the satisfaction of knowing they affected a person's life, even if it is in a negative way. Only you can truly know what your sexual preference is, and anyone who's worth listening to won't judge you or accuse you of being someone you're not. Link to comment
spaggle Posted October 31, 2004 Share Posted October 31, 2004 i started college a couple of months back and made loadsa friends, and one close guy friend said i dressed like a lesbian, i just found it funny, but i did not change the way i dressed. me and him are good mates and we joke about stuff. lol, i just think its funny coz i am bicurious and i was quite shocked when he thought i was gay (he doesnt know im bi-curious). But dude dont worry, im sure ur a great person, if its deppressing u all u need to do is laugh about it, it may not make it go away, but ull feel better. + who cares what other people THINK you are, only YOU can KNOW what u are. Link to comment
naecha Posted October 31, 2004 Share Posted October 31, 2004 I used to be called a lesbian! Mainly because I wasn't afraid to talk about boobs and stuff when I was in primary school.. the people I went to primary school with ended up at the same high school and it spread around there as well...I didn't think I was lesbian! And I'm not, but sometimes it all just really got to me! Link to comment
shorty4ever15 Posted November 1, 2004 Share Posted November 1, 2004 All that I can really say is that society is cruel. People pick on the weakling no matter how nice a person they may actually be. "Nice guys finish last." Through junior high school, a lot of people made fun of my best friend--calling him gay and stuff. He wasn't and isn't gay. There is nothing about him that reveals a "gay" person. He was just another straight person. As we became friends, we got really close. We never did anything "gay". We were just best friends. Now, as it turns out, I ended up falling in love with him. We're both 19 now and he is definitely not gay. He is just a great person. Link to comment
NotGay,Really Posted November 2, 2004 Share Posted November 2, 2004 For years and years people assumed I was gay. I first became aware of this when I was in college, when a female friend matter-of-factly mentioned it. Even though I didn't think I was particularly gay, it made me start thinking about it. Eventually (years later), I became convinced I was gay, and tried to reconcile this with how I really felt. (I didn't really want to have sex with a man-- and I thought it was wrong to have any sex outside of marrieage!) I actually "came out" to a few close friends, and sought some professional help. The best advice I ever got was to seek intimacy, and see what ACTUALLY appealed to me. (Note: "Intimacy" doesn't have to mean sex. Don't start having sex unless you want that other person in your life!) What appeals to me is a wonderful woman who is very fulfilling, and who I love very much. Am I gay? Was everyone wrong? Who knows. But I do know what is real in my life right now, and I am not going to allow others to define me. Link to comment
gefallener_engel Posted November 2, 2004 Share Posted November 2, 2004 a few friends of mine are supposedly "gay" i dont really think they are but could be, i dont know or care really anyone who has problems against people because of the way the look or are, and things they cant change have problems. you are probably very well-mannered and polite, and cute at that, and some people cant take that yes this thing happens a lot in high school, especially mine hope things are better now engel Link to comment
Diemension Posted November 2, 2004 Share Posted November 2, 2004 A few moths ago I found out that all my friends thought I was gay for about 2 years, and i never knew it before then. I found it out when talking to a female friend of mine..she told me a friend of hers had told her someone told her I was gay! lol I´M NOt GAY!! I didn´t get annoyed...but curious. I wondered why they thought that about me.. I concluded tha problem was i spoke very "openly" about penises and vaginas with both girls and boys..and that confused them. Think what you think about you...not what others do. Link to comment
drahcir Posted November 2, 2004 Author Share Posted November 2, 2004 i know, for me i didn't talk about sex openly either because i found talking about it openly a bit inappropriate. Thats also one reason why people thought i might be gay. I used to be called a lesbian! Mainly because I wasn't afraid to talk about boobs and stuff when I was in primary school.. the people I went to primary school with ended up at the same high school and it spread around there as well...I didn't think I was lesbian! And I'm not, but sometimes it all just really got to me! Link to comment
tea Posted November 2, 2004 Share Posted November 2, 2004 *sigh* At least people thought you have a preference. Everyone in my middle school thought I was Asexual, they'd even write asexual tags and stick it on my back, all because I never showed any interest to any guys. HELLO? I was 12! It got better in high school though, except some people wanted me to see if I'm a lesbian... then I became really close friends with a gay guy, so people thought we were going out... fun times. "Are you and Ryan going out? You're always together and I saw him going to your house!" *smile smile smile smile smile* *smirk* "What do you think? *wink*" XD Now things are fixed. Link to comment
jbretne7 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 You are not alone, I have on many occasions been falsely accused of being Gay, or "Gaydar" as they put it. First of all, Relax ; there are many cruel and deceptive people out there. I would call them "despoilers", because they are jealous for some reason, they make a Psychological attack at you and in many cases this is due to their own insecurities. But I would read alot more of it if I were you . All this was provided by a Very Professional and Understanding Psychiatrist. sorry for some reason this site doesnt allow to post url's so You have to add in the W's and the Com Link to comment
Seraphim Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 This thread is 11 years old. Link to comment
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