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overstepping the mark - how much could it scare a guy...

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O.K. Imagine this: You meet a girl you have to do a kissing scene with in a short film for a friend's film/theatre course. You get along like a house on fire, both being very professional about the kissing stuff, and find that you have a lot in common. After a few days rehearsing she picks you up and drives you to the shoot location. Filming is great. Driving home she inquires about where your house is so she can drop you there. You say it's all right, she can keep driving, you don't mind walking home from her house. Journey ends at her house, you talk in the car for a while and she offers a drink inside. You say, Sure. Once inside though, you both start rambling about nothing, neither knows what's meant to happen, it's all cool, but there's tension. She says she better let you get home. You say good night and part.


You don't know this... but she closes the door and swears because that didn't go anything like it was meant to. She didn't want things to get steamy or anything - that wasn't her intention at all - she just wanted to get to know you better and relax. She's paranoid at the best of times and so to ease her mind she sends an email apologising for talking so much nonsense and that she'll understand if you think she's a complete nutter. She sighs and goes to bed. She thinks she might actually like you.


You get home and read the email and laugh because you were rambling as well and thought you looked like the fool - not her. You tell her this in a reply and suggest that you catch a film some time - perhaps one of the many you spoke about ad nauseum. She makes you laugh in her response and she leaves her number if you feel like calling. The next day you call. She's at work. She asks if she can call you back when she gets home. You say, Sure.


You don't know this... but she hangs up the phone and squeals with glee. She totally didn't expect you to call. She was absolutely convinced that you were going to stay away forever. But no, you called, she didn't have to call you a week later to see if you really did like or dislike her, you called which must mean you're interested, at least a little, and that gives her butterflies in her stomach. She gets home and calls you as soon as she's through the door.


You answer the phone and are surprised she called you on the home number. She apologises and asks if you would like her to call you on the mobile - she only called this number because it was the one displayed on her phone from your call. You tell her not to worry about it. You have a lovely converstaion, you laugh at things she says, she laughs at things you say and you both apologise for being awkward last night. The water is smooth again. Suddenly, she says: Do you want to hear something funny? You say, Sure! She says, After you called tonight I got butterflies in my stomach. You pause and then say, Why? She pauses and then says, Because.. I didn't think you were going to call. You say, But... you asked me to call you. She says, No I didn't! You say, Yes you did, in your email, you said "if you call me I'll call you back". She says, No, I said my phone is always on silent so if you want to call I might miss it but don't worry, I'll call you back. You say, Oh. She says, Yeah. You say, Well, um, yes, butterflies, well, that's, yes, metaphorical I hope? She laughs and says, Yes, thank god! And you move on to another topic. You arrange to go to a movie next Wednesday. The phone call ends.


You don't know this but she is WriIIithing in SHAme!! How could she be so STUPid!! Butterflies? WHat the hell was she thinking!! I'll tell you what she was thinking, she was thinking silly romantic thoughts... she was thinking you were thinking the same thing as she was.. and NOw, she's probably TOtally frightened you off because you think she's a psycho femme fatale who has a screw loose.



Well, that's what I did. I'm the girl. I'm the stupid one with the butterflies and OH I would do anything to take it back. There I was thinking he'd called because he actually liked me... but it turns out, in his words, he called because I asked him to. Which.. I didn't.. but still... I was convinced he would reciprocate the sentiment.


What do you reckon boys - have I totally stuffed it up?

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^_~ It'll be alright. Sometimes guys need encouragements to go on pursuing a relationship anyways.


Gosh, I had to give bf a kiss on a cheek because "he's a good person" to hint he can ask me out. T_T. (I ran after that. First time I did anything that drastic to give a green light.)


Randomly saying you had butterflies in your stomach isn't that bad. Maybe the butterflies came from worry about whether he'll be your friend... ^^:

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First of all dont over analyze why he called.. HE CALLED didn't he.. just what you wanted....... if he dind't want to call believe me he would not have called...... no one put a gun to his head and forced him to call... look for the good in this...... and you did nothing wrong with telling him about the butterfies..... heck if it had been me...... that would have encouraged me.......... it would have let me know you cared.. lol.... easing the tension of the upcoming call.... but that's me

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cool. you're right. he called and that's what counts. I just feel like I may have overstepped the mark by being too forward... but then again, it's not like I asked him to marry me or anything... and maybe, maybe I think the butterflies thing is worse than it is because I know my intentions - if he wasn't sure of my intentions it mightn't be as obvious... Gah. I just feel silly, that's all. In my head it was all so smooth - lol! D'oh.

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No, you didn' t overstep your boundaries. He misinterpreted the message but it looks like things turned out okay. My guess is he just thinks of you as a friend, but it might be something else. After all, liking someone makes you do weird things. Don't sweat it. You did a good thing. He's probably thinking your weird, but nothing more than that. Good luck at the movies.

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