If he talks about his Girlfriend can he still like me?

[ff2afewyearslater]

There's a guy at work who I really thought was interested in me. He NEVER talks about his girlfriend (she lives in another city and I don't think they see each other very often). He laughs/jokes with me @ work, makes eye contact and I thought I was getting signals from him.

 

At lunch on Friday, we were talking about religion. He makes a statement about his girlfriend and her religion, and I feel myself getting red-faced. I can't recall him ever saying anything about her directly to me. There was an awkward silence, at least I thought it was awkward, and I say "gee, I really don't know anything about that religion." Then we changed the subject.

 

So what does that mean? Is he reminding me he has a girlfriend and subtlely telling me to back off? Because the rest of the afternoon back in the office, his behavior was consistent with the way it has been (laughing/joking/smiling/etc).

 

Or is it possible that this guy doesn't like me at all and he's just making the best of the workday, and because we work in the same office why not talk/joke with me?

[Lily04]

it's really hard to tell, it can work both ways. It's also hard to tell if he felt awkward in the moment you described & if that was because he mentioned his gf, or because you seemed flustered by the topic of religion or mentioning his gf. But the jokes, etc. seem like he likes you. I was in a similar situation before a few times actually, except the guy decided to stay with his girlfriend. Try talking with him more & seeing what happens. He may like you but still feels a responsibility with his gf..perhaps ask him out for lunch and see what happens? that seems sorta innocent since you both work together.

 

good luck in any case!

 

lily04

[bobster]

I aggree with Lily04

 

Its as if this guy has "rubber stamped" his relationship with another girl on you. Maybe he just wanted to see how you react when he told you this.

 

Do you know for def he has a GF? Why don't you drop subtle questions to him involving this girl, like "did you do anything fun at the weekend?" ............if he says he done things with his friends, ask him what his plans are for the week ahead. Find out about this GF.

 

But I have to say, work and relationships are mostly recipies for disaster, I've been there. Just take care.

 

He definitely does like you, he wouldn't make the effort to laugh / joke if he didn't!

[ff2afewyearslater]

I know the girlfriend definitely exists, if that's what you mean (I met her a long time ago). I have asked from time to time what he is doing for the weekend, he never has said he is going to be spending it with her (she lives in another city so it is fairly big deal for them to spend the entire weekend together). I'm sure she comes to visit him. But he might say "I'm going to visit my Mom this weekend" instead of "Kelly and I are going to visit my Mom this weekend" which I think is a little weird. I mean, why not just talk about her openly unless he is trying to hide the fact he's in a relationship?

 

On the same note....how close can you really be to someone that lives 3 hours away? I know some couples can make it work, but it seems that people would always prefer having someone closeby as opposed to far away. ???

[acts12]

What kind of relationship do you want from this guy. Think about. He has a girlfriend, BUT, he is talking to you while he is supposedly supposed to be with her. He WILL do the same to you if you date him. No doubt about that. And if you do date him, the way that you 'caught' him will always be in the back of your mind, as it will not be hard for another girl to do the same.

 

If you are only looking for a hook up then that is probably a different story. My guess is that he is only looking to hook-up and by telling you about is girlfriend he may be trying to see if you care that he has a girlfriend for that very reason.

 

IN otherwords, he is doing one of two things 1. Going to break up with his girlfriend but wants to make sure that he likes you more before he officially does so that he has something else first. (Both guys and girls like to do this by the way). Or....2. He is only planning on using you to hook up with since he has a girlfriend, but she is so far away, and he cant always be with her. In otherwords, using you. You have to decide if that is what you want for yourself.