Hardtimes Posted July 22, 2012 Share Posted July 22, 2012 I think the trauma ad shock of this breakup is peaking... The more days pass by the worse im getting, its been 8 days nc and 8 days no alcohol for me, ive been distracting myself so much but on a gorgeous weekend like this i feel so lost and lonely, i hate to admit but i do miss her, its really starting to sink in that she will never ever ever call me and i feel devastated, ive been motivated this whole week and was truly fighting hard but today i cant even get out of bed, i feel paralyzed im 29 yrs old and actually crying as i write this and i kno its pathetic but really just having the worst heartache Link to comment
pnoy Posted July 22, 2012 Share Posted July 22, 2012 Hi hardtimes i know exactly were your coming from its so horrible these feelings mine is 4 mnths down the line he is a cocaine addict has been for 25 yrs dont think he will give it up but well done to you 8 days without alcohol your not pathetic for crying its because you have feelings your not made of wood you wil get up and down emotions i do all the time am happy then sad just keep posting here were all in the same boat xx Link to comment
tness Posted July 22, 2012 Share Posted July 22, 2012 Hardtimes: I feel your pain, because I have the same pain, had it for many months now. But I think I'm getting cold, not sure. pnoy: we are all in the same boat, but sometimes I feel that the boat is sinking. Why is life so hard to live?? She is happy and smiling the cold *****!!! Link to comment
pnoy Posted July 22, 2012 Share Posted July 22, 2012 i know i feel like my boat has well sunk my friend said to me why would you want to be with someone that doesnt want to be with you she is right but its so hard Link to comment
ErikSifu Posted July 22, 2012 Share Posted July 22, 2012 I think the trauma ad shock of this breakup is peaking... The more days pass by the worse im getting, its been 8 days nc and 8 days no alcohol for me, ive been distracting myself so much but on a gorgeous weekend like this i feel so lost and lonely, i hate to admit but i do miss her, its really starting to sink in that she will never ever ever call me and i feel devastated, ive been motivated this whole week and was truly fighting hard but today i cant even get out of bed, i feel paralyzed im 29 yrs old and actually crying as i write this and i kno its pathetic but really just having the worst heartache this is so true !!! thats just how im feeling now.... 5 days NC and missing her alot.... i drink myself to sleep which is the only way i can fall asleep for now.... I need to stop this and find another way ... im also 29 and this is my first sunday without her... Link to comment
learning2relax Posted July 22, 2012 Share Posted July 22, 2012 The beginning is the absolute worst. It is as if you are healing from a major accident and cannot move, without the physical evidence. The mind (and heart) is a powerful thing. But just as your mind is holding you hostage to the pain, you can also will yourself to start moving and start healing. At first it feels impossible but if you take steps to do things little by little to move, do things, see people, etc.... it gets better and gives your mind less time to torture yourself with the memories and details that keep you paralyzed. Put little goals in front of yourself and give yourself credit when you achieve them. Find things that wear you out to help you find sleep vs. alcohol. Although exercise can invigorate, one of the exercises that can wear you flat is swimming - something to consider. Other things like taking a shower before bed to calm and/or reading yourself to sleep might help too. Don't let this own you. While I understand that motivation seems very foreign and down right impossible at the moment, try and care for yourself to find it again. Not that I am suggesting that this will happen but something to consider if you can't find any way to motivate yourself from within......if she were to come back around would she find the person you are at this moment attractive? Or would it cause her to feel guilt and run or to feel anger and validation for her decision to leave? Caring for yourself is the best you can do for you whether or not she returns. If she does, you will be in a better place to know whether or not you want to explore reconciliation vs. wanting it out of a place of desperation. If she doesn't ever return, you have taken care of yourself to get back to more of who you are with a better understanding of what you want in life and in relationships - romantic, friendships, etc.... It may also help to talk to a professional to work through your grief as it takes a considerable amount of time to find your way through it. A much better alternative to using substances to dull the pain. That is only delaying the process you will eventually need to get through in order to enjoy, trust, share and love. Please take care of yourself and explore healthier alternatives that get you through this and back to your true self. You are worthy but you have to start telling yourself that until you believe it to be true so that your actions support it. A lot of us, if not most of us on ena have been there and those of us that have been there will tell you that it does get better. Link to comment
ErikSifu Posted July 22, 2012 Share Posted July 22, 2012 thank you very !!! Very much .......... I will try my best to do just that !!! Im so glad i found this forum , you guys are incredible.!!! Link to comment
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