This girl I like just, broke up w/ her bf. Should i pursue?

[aznboy88]

Hi guys, well I haven't been in this forum quite awhile now. Now I'm back! Well lately I been talkin to this girl that i've been talking to through out this week. Yesterday her bf gotten into a huge argument. She was askin me for advice, what she should do about this situation. She was thinkin about forgivin him, after he play her for like 3 times already. He always was manage to fix the situation by sayin "i love u to her" but not this time. So she finally came to her senses and broke up with the guy. Now, should i just wait it out, or pursue her? Any advice would be great. thanks.

[CenaGeode]

Wait, and I say this from personal experience. I told a girl how I felt about her a week after she broke up with her boyfriend, and she told me that she was not ready for a relationship. Then again, I did not actually ask her out, but people need time to rebound from failed relationships.

 

I would say to just spend time with her, and wait until you think she is over her old boyfriend to pursue a relationship.

[xxlarixx]

definitely give the girl time, her relationship sounded pretty tough and i bet wut she wants right now, or what she needs is just air, let her breathe, but let her know that u like her, compliment her, tell her shes cute, ask her to help u with ur hw, etc. BUT NO SUDDEN MOVES! go slow, DONT directly tell her u like her, considering the situation shes in, she might freak out if u tell her u like her, just go slow, and make her realize that ur different than her ex boyfriend, let her know that ur a gentlemen! girls love that! hope i helped!

[CenaGeode]

I must disagree with the previous poster. I told a girl that I liked her one week after her breakup, and she did NOT freak out. In fact, she was really happy, and told me that she liked me, too. Of course, we both understood that she needed more time, but telling her has now built me a solid foundation, which can be built upward by spending more time with her.

 

But girls vary, so if you do tell her how you feel, you are taking a huge risk.

[mahlina]

-Hey you

 

Bad idea. Do not pursue her at this point. She's not completely over her 'man' yet. Although she says that she's "over it" and "won't give him the time of day", I bet you anything, she might even return to this guy again. Why? Well, sometimes, even though people say, "I have come to my senses that my Ex was the worse..yada..yada..", they're only saying that as a way to 'cover up' for what they're truly feeling. Meaning, they're lying to themselves, and haven't entirely come to their senses. yet. They're just in the process of beginning to realize that the ex isn't 'the one.' Sometimes it takes people several times to make the same mistakes over and over, in order for them to realize that their ex is a total screw up! They won't realize things until they're caught up in a vicious cycle. The only time in which they truly do come to a realization and learn, is when they finally take action, by:

1.) Not calling the ex.

2.) Start dating new people.

3.) Enjoying life without having their ex's around.

 

Sounds like this girl's still keeping in touch with her ex. At no point in time, at least for now, is she ready for a 'new relationship.' Try not to be her punching bag. I'm sure that you can be a shoulder to cry on, but once she's over her pain with her man, that's probably where you'll stay: just a friend. I'm sorry, but sometimes that's just the dirty truth. Sometimes, some women just like having someone of the oppossite sex to lean on when they're 'trying to get over their ex', or trying to cope with stress in general. Unfortunately, it's at the expense of a truly caring guy's emotions. I think there's another term for this tendency: relationship co-dependency.

 

If anything, 'rebound relationships' are really hard to work at. They don't last as long. They might, but it's tough. Just be you. Be supportive, but don't be there for her all of the time. Don't get your hopes up too high. And, if she truly does like you, then things will work out on its own, when the time's right. For now, it's not. Be cheery and happy. Be yourself. Eventually, that might even be enough to attract her once she's truly over this playa! Hope this helps. -Mahlina

[xbox_modding_freak]

Hi guys, well I haven't been in this forum quite awhile now. Now I'm back! Well lately I been talkin to this girl that i've been talking to through out this week. Yesterday her bf gotten into a huge argument. She was askin me for advice, what she should do about this situation. She was thinkin about forgivin him, after he play her for like 3 times already. He always was manage to fix the situation by sayin "i love u to her" but not this time. So she finally came to her senses and broke up with the guy. Now, should i just wait it out, or pursue her? Any advice would be great. thanks.

 

i recommend giving her a bit of breathin space first shes just been burnt and te chanec of her risking it again is slim

[aznboy88]

oh wow! Mahlina, im very surprise to hear from ya again.. I just came back to this forum today. B/c i never ran into a situation like this before, and i thought it would be fun askin/sharing advice once again.