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My ex wants to hang out. Advice?


Rockyr87

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So my ex and I broke up about 7 months ago. Until maybe a month or two ago we hadn't really talked at all. Lately when we talk it seems more happy and light-hearted. Recently she even said she missed me. The other night she asked me what I was doing for Spring break and I told her. Then I asked her and she told me. After that I asked if she'd maybe want to hang out and almost right away she said yes (which surprised me). She lives about 3 hours from me and she said she was thinking about coming straight to where I live from there and then going to spend the rest of the time with her family. After I told her what days I'm working she said "I'll think about it". We're supposed to hang out Wednesday if it works out. Is there something I'm not seeing? Should I count on her to want to hang out?

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How much have you healed from your ex?

 

I still think about her, but not obsessively. I quit blaming myself for everything and just moved on from it. It never comes up when we talk. Most of the time it's just about school or what we're doing it whatever. The only conversation that stuck out was when she randomly texted me saying that she missed me. When you say don't give her all week..what do you mean?

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Why did she break up with you? How long did you date? Maybe she is bored and looking for some fun, someone to entertain her. I wouldn't try to read into it too much.

 

We were only together for a month. Her and I broke up because I wasn't emotionally in the right place..too many things were happening and I just didn't have it together. I don't want to read too much into it, but it's hard not to since I never expected this to happen. It makes me think she wants to work things out just cause of the way she's talked to me, but at the same time I have to be prepared for the worst case scenario.

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We were only together for a month. Her and I broke up because I wasn't emotionally in the right place..too many things were happening and I just didn't have it together. I don't want to read too much into it, but it's hard not to since I never expected this to happen. It makes me think she wants to work things out just cause of the way she's talked to me, but at the same time I have to be prepared for the worst case scenario.

 

Why do you have to be prepared for the "worst case scenario"?

 

Empower yourself! It's HER who has to be prepared for the worst case scenario...like you won't accept her back into YOUR life.

 

Act the role of the victim --- and you'll continue to be victimized.

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Well I'm really hoping that she wants to reconcile and get back together, but I don't want to really look forward to that and disregard the fact that the opposite is equally possible, if not more. I'm just trying not to set myself up for a letdown.

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She said "I'll think about it", which means she's still on her power trip from ending the relationship and likely has little to no interest in you romantically. You shouldn't have asked her to meet up, always let her suggest it. I would shoot her a text saying you can't do whatever on Wednesday.

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Her and I ended up not hanging out today. I texted her this morning saying there was a change in my work schedule and she read it and never responded or said anything else about it. When we talked about it Sunday she said it was really a possibility for today, tomorrow or Friday. Should I count on her to want to still or not?

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Her and I ended up not hanging out today. I texted her this morning saying there was a change in my work schedule and she read it and never responded or said anything else about it. When we talked about it Sunday she said it was really a possibility for today, tomorrow or Friday. Should I count on her to want to still or not?

No. Do nothing. In fact, I'm hoping, and, so should you, that she doesn't contact you. Her behavior rude. In the extreme. There's decent women out there. Find one. Date them.

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But why would she lead me on like that?

 

Rocky, I think the other posters have given you good advice. Don't set yourself up for heartache. The phrase "I'll think about it" tells you everything you need to know. She's still on a power trip and feels entitled to call the shots.

 

It doesn't mean that she doesn't like you. But it does mean that she doesn't like you enough to treat you decently. She's leading you on because it makes her feel powerful, desired, and in control. Don't play.

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