My boyfriend only lasts seconds during sex.

[MissMaggie]

I have been with my boyfriend for about a year now. For the first 8 or 9 months, he would last up to an hour. -always. Now for the past few months he ejaculates immediately after he enters me. When I say immediately....I'm talking about less than a minute. Every single time. I don't understand this change.

 

I suppose we don't have sex AS often. It used to be everyday, now maybe 4 or 5 times a week. So it's not that big of a change. I look the same physically, and we fight more than we did. I can't imagine he would be more attracted to me now than he was? Overall we do have a good relationship. He doesn't do drugs and only drinks occasionally. He constantly tells me he is so embarrassed by this. Has anyone had a similar experience, and do you know ways to fix it? We have done oral, but it just isn't the same as making love.

[digdug]

I hate to say this but ejaculating early isn't always as sign of a woman being attractive. I was not attracted to my wife for a long, long time. Our marriage had many issues, and they caused me to fall out of love with her and thus not be attracted. Her "fix" to our marriage was to have sex, she thought it would bring us together. I was a minute man as well, but only because I wanted to get it over with. There was never any foreplay, and I had no reason to learn how to fight the urge to ejaculate for longer periods of sex. I started to honestly believe I was no good in bed.

 

Fast forward to my gf (now ex). Our sessions would last hours upon hours. They would involve foreplay, oral, intercourse, more oral ... whatever I could do to continue to please her until she was ready to pass out, lol. If I felt close, I'd stop and slow down, switch up the rhythm. Other times I'd stop and direct my "attention" somewhere else. It can't just be about laying down and doing it.

 

I'd say try other things too. Not just foreplay, but slowing down during. There is no rule that says once it's in, you can't take out until later.

 

Good luck!!

~dig

[knockoff]

may i but in here , in my case when i first get with a women i can go all night long , the minute i get feelings for them its over in 2 mins, i cant explain why , over numerous relationships this has been the case, just my 2 cents

[digdug]

may i but in here , in my case when i first get with a women i can go all night long , the minute i get feelings for them its over in 2 mins, i cant explain why , over numerous relationships this has been the case, just my 2 cents

 

That is interesting and the polar opposite of me .... Hope this doesn't get confusing lol

 

~dig

[RadicalDreamer]

may i but in here , in my case when i first get with a women i can go all night long , the minute i get feelings for them its over in 2 mins, i cant explain why , over numerous relationships this has been the case, just my 2 cents

I have heard of this too. Many anthropologists suggest that the reason that humans copulate for such long periods is to build the intimacy necessary to raise a child together. Makes sense, since sex between humans usually lasts much longer than mating in the rest of the animal kingdom, and humans have one of the longest childhood periods of any mammal. One possible interpretation could be that once the intimacy is built, the "drive" to just keep up the stamina might dwindle for some people. Though that doesn't mean the situation can't be salvaged.

 

Also, though, anxiety and depression can cause a guy to finish early as well. This is why antidepressants (specifically serotonin re-uptake inhibitors, such as Citalopram) are often prescribed in lower doses to men who ejaculate prematurely. Stress usually doesn't effect it, but lasting feelings of anxiety about life pressures caused by stress can have similar effects to serotonin levels as clinical depression. I don't know if this applies to the OP's boyfriend, but it may bear some looking into? People who are depressed usually don't appear to be so to those around them until long after the fact.

[pl3asehelp]

may i but in here , in my case when i first get with a women i can go all night long , the minute i get feelings for them its over in 2 mins, i cant explain why , over numerous relationships this has been the case, just my 2 cents

 

That makes total sense to me. When you first get together you don't know each other well enough to have a strong bond, which makes sex infinitely more pleasurable, hence you can't last as long.