torn between

[h3ad8ang3r]

this is kind of a weird situation: I have a girlfriend and we've been together for about 2 months now. we're really happy always have a good time; we love eachother. some say you can only love one person at a time, but i disagree. there's another girl; a friend i've known since middle school, and we're really close; she's told me many times that she loves me, sincerely, and i love her too; we've been through a lot. note: i never cross the line into cheating. the thing is that i want to know if i'll be happier with the friend than my current girlfriend. it may sound shallow, but before the relationship gets too serious, i want to examine the possibility. but the more i think about it, the more i dont want to because i dont want people thinking i left my girlfriend for the friend. that and i dont know if my current girlfriend will still want to be with me if things dont end up as good with the friend. the bottom line is that i love my friend more than my current girlfriend; so which do i go for: great love, or just love?

[candianeh2000]

it seems to me like you answered your question in your post. if you really do love your friend more than your current gf, then I would go for things with her. However, before you do this, I would strongly think about your feelings and try to sort them out, because once you make a decision you can't go back.

 

Another thing to consider is what you should tell your other friend. Frankly, I would treat this as 2 separate issues because in my opinion they are. 1)You want to break up with you gf 2)You want to go out with your friend. Rather than that you want to break up b/c you want to go out with your friend.

 

In my opinion this distinction is important because odds are you wouldn't develop feelings for this other girl if there weren't something you didn't like about the one you are going out with at the moment. I also raise the point because I am not sure that you want your friend to know thats why you broke up. Maybe just say something vague like, "we weren't right for each other" Only because do you want her to then be insecure if you guys go out that maybe you are interested in some other friend you have.

[900]

I'm in almost the exact same situation you are at the moment. Except I think mine is a little more dire. I have been seriously dating a girl for almost 9 months now. We have not had sex, though we have engaged in 'activities'. Recently (about a month ago) an old friend of mine who I've had feelings for admitted that she had them as well and was interested in dating me. I love my current girlfriend, but as with everyone she has her shortcomings, which this other girl doesn't have and vice versa. So I sit in much the same spot as yourself. I have told my girlfriend about my feelings for this other girl and we are attempting to work it out, taking 'a break' if need be. I would advise that you do the same, or follow candianeh2000's post.