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My gf just broke up with me for no reason.. I don't know what to do..

Sallee05

By Sallee05
in Breaking Up Advice

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Sallee05 Newbie

Sallee05

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Me and my girlfriend been dating for 3 1/2 months and its been amazing i know every relationship has its fights and what not. Last night she broke up with me at a party with all our friends their.. She didn't give me a real good reason beside what are u gonna do after i go to college and me and her were already talking about me going down there for school so we can be together. before last night everything was fine and happy happy! She told me on thanksgiving she's thankfull for having me in her life and i said same back, and she wrote me a note on our 3rd month that she's fallen inlove with me and starting to trust me more. I believed it and it made me happy tear. She's the girl i ever reallly been happy with and she dosn't trust that and she scared to lvoe someone because her past.. But she finally started to trust me. i'm at a loss im scared i wont get her back and idk what i did for this to happen.. She's my one and only and it makes me sad and im depressed as * * * * that i let her in my heart and having her say she promised not to hurt me when she gave me our 3mnth present which was a necklace.. Someone please help. I just want my roo back I never did anything wrong to her never hurt her in anyway what so ever , i am so supportive and i give her , her space. I just need my baby back

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LaKings55 Apprentice

LaKings55

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Gotta let her go. I hate to say it, but I don't think she was nearly as invested in the relationship as you were. I also know you don't want to hear it, but you're both young, and in youth relationships seem to come and go faster than the seasons change. Go with no contact, block her out, and move on.

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LaKings55 Apprentice

LaKings55

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I know the feeling, most of us on here do. But, you can't make someone love you. Reaching out to her, professing your love will likely come accross as not masculine, and incredibly desperate. You have made her your life, despite claiming to have given her "space." You need to prove to yourself that you can live without her, which you can. You had a life before her, and you'll have a life after her. How do you think people make it through divorce, or break-ups that happen a few years down the road? I can guarantee you that in most cases, at least one person was still "in love." However, in your instance, 3 months is nowhere near the amount of time necessary for "true love" to be realized. Therefore, your relationship more than likely can classified as youthful infatuation. Now, you can either become defensive, attempt to show her how sensitive you are and how much you've changed in a foolish attempt to get back a girl who has no real interest in having a relationship with you. Or you can mature some, be a man, go NC, and move on with your life. I know all this sounds harsh, but this is the conclusion many of us have come to after having our hearts broken, having rushed to our exes and begged and pleaded only to feel ashamed and weak afterwards. Save your dignity and let her go.

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Lithp Apprentice

Lithp

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No Contact is something that is brought up a lot on these boards, and honestly, in most cases it can be a life saver.

 

You delete her from your life as well as you can. Get rid of her number from your phone, block and delete her on Facebook, any means you have of contacting her you need to get rid of it. It sounds like a difficult thing to do and at first it is, but after a while you'll breathe easier because of it.

 

Use this time of No Contact to really work on yourself - do some soul searching. There is a reason your relationship with her didn't work out, and as good as you may have been to her, you played a part in it as well. Think about it and work on it - your next relationship will be better for it, and you yourself as a person will grow from it as well.

 

Make sure you are surrounded by good people, and try to be the best person you can be. When you can look at yourself in the mirror and know that you are a genuinely good person, you know your worth, and in turn you will start to only have people in your life who appreciate that.

 

Keep yourself distracted during the hard times. Feeling pain is fine, it's normal and healthy, it's ok to cry, all that good stuff - but let yourself feel it and then let it go. Don't dwell on it, don't over analyse it, just accept what you're feeling and let go of it. Deep breathing helps, as silly as it sounds. Listen to good music, call a friend, go for a walk, whatever - but in those moments when you feel you're at your lowest, just sit back and observe it and let it pass. You'll learn a lot about yourself this way, and it'll help you to become more emotionally aware.

 

This is a difficult time you're going through, you are literally grieving the loss of a loved one. No matter how young you are or short lived it was with this girl, what you're feeling is very real to you right now. It will get better, absolutely! Someday you'll find someone you connect with on a whole other level and this 3 month relationship and subsequent heartbreak will seem like child's play to you. Just give it a bit of time and you'll bounce back better than ever.

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LaKings55 Apprentice

LaKings55

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God this sucks... im never the one to break up with girls because i have to big of a heart.. to put someone through that wat im going through, i rather talk it out and fix things if cant be fixed then so be it..

 

And that's fine to be like that, but not to the point that others walk all over you, or you have to walk on eggshells around them. Be a man, be confident, have an opinion. I just don't want to see you fall in a trap where every girl you meet becomes "the one." Three months is hardly enough time to get to know someone.

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