tom2602 Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 Hey guys, new to this so just gonna give a bit of background and whats happened and hopefully your opinions will help out! Me and my ex (18 and 16) broke up a month ago after 6 months, with her dumping me by email, and I know we're young and it wasn't long but we didn't ever argue and everything was great. What shocked me the most was we went to a concert the night before and there was nothing wrong and it was a great night, or at least nothing wrong that I picked up on! Initially we kept contact, both initiating it every few days. However after reading threads on here I realised this was doing me no good as to be honest I wanted her back desperately and it was just dragging out the effects of me being dumped, which wasn't helping at all! So on the 7th Nov, whilst I was out running she sent a message saying something like 'heyyaaa, you ok?!' on facebook as we were still regularly contacting each other. When I replied I said that I couldn't keep doing this as it was keeping my hopes up for us getting back together, and that I was sorry for getting too comfy in the relationship as we'd gone 2 weeks not seeing each other! She said she understood the need to stop but didn't accept the apology. Therefore we got into quite an in-depth conversation about why we broke up as I never really got a solid reason, and that ended with her saying 'I have messed up emotions and I didn't have the same feelings anymore' and it ended with her saying 'I need time, like lots of time'. I agreed to give her this, and have managed NC for 11 days and counting. This has done it's job for me so far, even though it's early days, as I'm slowly moving on and getting myself back on track as the dumping took me totally by surprise! However, today I hit a little set back and this is where I'm hoping for some views and opinions. I went on facebook today and I noticed the pictures at the top of my wall had changed. I hadn't added any new ones or been tagged so I was a little confused, but then realised they had been pictures of me and my ex from a weekend away in the summer. I'm not a major uploader of photos on there so it never bothered me they were there as eventually newer ones would go up. So anyway, I've now realised that my ex has untagged me in the photos?! I would understand her untagging herself in them, but I don't see how untagging me in them has done anything worthwhile? The pictures and the album are still on her profile, so she hasn't deleted them, just got rid of my tags and therefore they're off my profile. And since she dumped me over a month ago, I can't help but wonder why now? Is it because of the NC? The only thing I can think of is that she's looking for some form of reaction from me, which I won't be giving anytime soon! Sorry about the length but wanted to give as much info as possible! Link to comment
camus154 Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 Girlfriend breaks up with you. Ex girlfriend untags some photos of you. See the connection? Link to comment
tom2602 Posted November 18, 2011 Author Share Posted November 18, 2011 Yes I do see the connection and why it could happen, but doing it affected my profile and not hers. If she has met someone else, untagging me didn't alter her profile in anyway, they're still there to be seen. That's why even though what you say does make sense, if it had been untagging herself it would have made more sense. Link to comment
camus154 Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 You're looking for sense regarding an ex girlfriend during a break up via a silly website. How much sense does THAT make? Link to comment
tom2602 Posted November 18, 2011 Author Share Posted November 18, 2011 Maybe it doesn't make much sense at all, but I just wanted some opinions from people who have something constructive to say, and not just then resort to giving witty one liners when they get a response. Link to comment
camus154 Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 Fine. Here's my advice. The only reason you're wondering if she's trying to get a reaction out of you is because you, like so many others, open that lovely Pandora's Box called Facebook, looking for any little sign that she's still thinking of you. Status updates, photos, who was untagged in what photo, wall posts....whatever. So you'll climb right into that box of misery and then start coming up with a thousand and one questions that don't mean a single thing whatsoever, because you're reading into them in the first place. She's not trying to get a reaction out of you. She just untagged some photos. That's it. Now I'd strongly advice you to delete her as a friend and quit poking around what you know isn't going to do you any good anyway. Link to comment
sonypirates Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 He was being constructive but you aren't looking at the full picture. If you look at the grand scheme of you two getting back together then what happens on facebook is so stupid. If somehow facebook prevents you guys from getting back together then your relationship didn't have much depth. You're still at the stage (as the majority of people here are) where you tend to analyze everything your ex does. What does that really accomplish? Maybe she is trying to get a reaction out of you. So what? Maybe she did it cause you're not in a relationship anymore and on the whim decided to do it. There are endless possibilities as to why she did it and you'll never know for sure unless she comes out and tells you why she did it. Link to comment
camus154 Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 tom, I kind of laid it on you there. I owe you an apology for that. You're one person going through your experience and, having seen so many FB questions here related to break ups, I tend to forget that and assume everyone has that perspective and should know better. My advice remains the same, though. I know it's human nature to look for little signs and FB makes it too damn easy to do just that, which is why I have a rather irrational disdain for it. Good luck. Link to comment
tom2602 Posted November 19, 2011 Author Share Posted November 19, 2011 Cheers for the advice guys, think I was just having a bad day and not really sure why I posted it up here. Camus no need for an apology, sometimes it takes some straight talking to get the message accross properly, so thanks for doing it! And your right Sonypirates, I do over analyse things, pretty much everything I do so no surprise I'm doing the same here! I'm just going to ignore it and continue to move on like you both suggested so cheers Link to comment
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