frustratedolma Posted November 16, 2011 Share Posted November 16, 2011 My wife and I have had a so-so sex life for the last 30 some odd years, which came to a crashing halt when she had a bout with breast cancer 4 years ago. Her chemo forced her through menopause, and the medications she is on are causing no libido, and vaginal dryness. We have recently tried to revive our sex life, and even with lubricants, I feel as though I am hurting her during intercourse and I cannot achieve orgasm. She is not reaching orgasm at all anymore. I still love her her madly, and desire her even though she has had a mastectomy, reduction and reconstruction surgeries, and is heavily scarred. She has also gained a good deal of weight, thanks to the arimidex. I am, however, very sexually unfulfilled. Even when we had a sex life, she was always the "passive' role....she hardly even touched me, and left it to me to do ALL foreplay--except for a few brief weeks about 10 years ago (I suspect she had an affair at the time, and was feeling guilty, but no matter---if she did, I wish she would again as the sex was great for the few weeks!). What can I do? I am no spring chicken anymore, and do not desire to leave her and ruin 30 years of friendship and marriage, yet I feel "cheated" out of a sex life. Any time the subject comes up, it tends to lead to an argument. Link to comment
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