adviceseeek22 Posted November 8, 2011 Share Posted November 8, 2011 SOME BACKGROUND: My ex broke up with me about two months ago. Basically we started dating near the end of June. I had come down a few times and we were so comfortable around each other and one night we finally kissed and actually made love that night. The connection was already so strong. She then came six hours the next weekend to see me before I moved the next week to her area for a potential job, where we basically became inseperable. She lives right beside my best friend in the apartment complex, so it was a difficult situation to start a relationship and stay appart, so basically I just lived over there with her. Now I'm not for moving so fast, but we always talked about the connection we had, the electricity between us. She ask me if I had ever been in anything like this before where you couldn't stop kissing each other. Everything was perfect, emotionally and sexually. We talked about how our lips and bodies fit perfect and she used to ask me how I could always be so good in bed. Unlike any other guy she has ever dated, she said I could get her wet with just my kisses, because everything with her was so electric and she said once she could actually feel how much I wanted her. We couldn't get enough sex. However, she had an ex that wasn't good with a job and other problems and broke up with him after they had been dating for 3 years about 6 months before us. He had actually moved there with her and still lives in the area. She would still let him see the dog that they purchased together and hated how she had hurt him, but said despite his changes too much had happened between them. She told me before we ever hooked up that she couldn't be with him because she knew he wasn't the man she wanted to be the father of her kids. She said she wanted a blue eyed baby and had always wanted to be with a person with blue eyes (I have blue eyes by the way). Her mom came and didn't give me a chance, I guess because I didn't fit the bill of what she described to her daughter after the last breakup (at least 36, professionally sound and so on). Her mom tries to control peoples life. It's all about professional life with her. My ex also acted weird at beginning of relationship when she came to see my for the weekend. She said she wanted me to pursue her, but didn't want to hurt me. A month or so in of living with her she acted weird and then we had a conversation about things moving to fast and this wasn't what she wanted, not breaking up with me. I agreed, but nothing really changed. She also told me a month in that I had made things difficult for her because she hates her job and wanted to be able to move for another without feeling horrible about leaving the one she loved. I made her feel better when I told her that I was still looking for my career and she knew what she wanted to do so I could find work flexibly and wouldn't give her up without a fight. She kiddingly ask me if I would go to her foreign country with her and I said yes without hesitation, something the next day she said she loved the most, "that you did it without hesitation." My friends also said I was too available to her and it's my nature to be so honest with a girl. She knew she was my dream girl, but I hoped I was her dream guy. I like to do things for girls, cause it makes me happy to make them happy so I always cooked a lot or cleaned, but being without a job these type thngs or taking control in the bedroom made me feel like a man. It was like we were married. We bathed together, brushed teeth together, I would pee or she would with me brushing my teeth somtimes. We cooked breakfsst and cleaned the house naked one morning. She said she had never felt so open with anyone. When she broke up with me, she said she didn't want a boyfriend right now and I knew that I had snuck up on her, always gotten her off her plan of being single and career minded, with no attachmens. I told her I felt like a fool because I knew it was early, but had even told my mom the week I was gone before the breakup that I thought she was maybe the one. She did tell me sometimes that the first night when she said she really liked me we should have waited to have sex like she wanted to. Anyway, we both cried with what I said. The week I had been gone she said my heart was for her to have and two days before we broke up we had a normal good day in which we talked about things we wanted to do. She agreed about feeling the connection and said she had no complaints about me and knew she could be so happy with me, but that she had gotten this in her head and once it was she had to go without. She said she realized all this and told me that's why she know she might potentially be making the biggest mistake of her life. She cried when I told her for a brief moment i got to be with exactly who I wanted to be with. I even said maybe in life that's why things are so good because the last so short but she nodded no to disagree, I think signaling the speciality of what we had. She also cried when I told her I loved her with my whole heart and that a piece of my heart would always belong to her before telling her I would be lying if I said that somewhere down the road if she realized it was a mistake and that she missed me and called I wouldn't at least talk to her and go from there. After we broke up, I left for about 2 weeks. I have been back for the remainder of our time apart and until last week we still had to live beside each other. I have held to the no contact rule. Neither of us have made any attempt to speak. I hear her take the dog out and she hears me. I went running one day and she ended up being out there in same area with dog, but I just kept running my route as though no one was there, not ignoring her, just not going out of my way I guess. I know the connection we had. We did have an accidental run in one night and the next day we laughed and briefly talked about it. Something I can't explain to everyone that thinks it is just your typical breakup. I knew and still recognize the uniqueness of what I had with her and would go to the ends of the earth to be back in her arms, but have decided to believe in this and give her the space, not trying to contact her (mistake I usually make), knowing only way to ever get her back. Anyway, I have dated some, but nothing serious, but these girls have made comments on my facebook wall, which my ex can see because we are still friends. Well, I noticed that my ex's main two friends had added her ex (the one she dated 3 years) as a friend on facebook, which is weird because they were friends with him before and have maintained contact with him, but just now added him as a friend last week. I then noticed yesterday that my ex added him as a friend also. Does this mean despite my belief in what we had being undeniable, game is over- that basically her friends have gotten what they wanted and she is now back with him, or am I reading way to much into this? Link to comment
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