ljpearso Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 Background: My girlfriend and I have been dating for just about three months now, but several (I'm not sure on the exact date) months ago she had to break off an engagement with a guy she'd been with on and off for 3 years. I'm not exactly when along the timeline this happened, but she was prescribed an antidepressant that caused her to gain a lot of weight in a short period of time. Last night she kind of broke down...we'd taken those cute little photobooth pictures together and she was convinced she looked like a man...and then her mom had to go and tell her something along the lines of "we all love you and think you're beautiful, you just need a different hair cut." All of that triggered a lot for her. I was thankful that she was able to tell me a lot about what she was feeling when we went to my house later, but I was pretty damn useless. I decided to put this in with the GLBT threads because I feel this issue is further complicated by the fact that we're both women and I think she compares herself to me physically. And even further complicated by the fact that I used to be dangerously anorexic/bulemic, so I know exactly how awful and powerful all the "ED thoughts" are. What I want to know is: How can I convince her how beautiful and perfect she is right now? She's obviously not happy with her appearance and has expressed a desire to change. I told her I would start doing yoga with her, because yoga is as much of a mindfulness exercise as it is a physical one. However, it's also sort of triggering to me to give her the guidance she's asking me for. I also wish there was a way I could tell her to stop listening to her mom's comments on her physical appearance without sounding disrespectful to her mom. Link to comment
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