the key to happiness is deep within ones own self...

[Borashi]

While you may not realize it, I sure didn't realize it until I turned 23 years old. It doesn't matter how much you want to make your family proud or your g/f or whomever it maybe, if your not happy with yourself in all aspects then you will never have a 100% happy life where you are content with just being yourself. For a while I wouldn't accept myself for who I was, I looked at my faults, my downfalls, I looked a lot into my past mistakes: the drinking, the drugs, my gambling addict, all the negative things that stopped me from becoming what I am today. Now at times I feel like I'm playing catch up within myself just to grow to where I want to be in all aspects of life. If there is only one piece of advice that I can give you it is this "We all only have one shot in life and we need to make the best of it, so we should always be about changing 24/7" I mention this as if you are constantly changing in positive ways, you'll never be unhappy, you'll realize your potential and you won't sell yourself short. No self help book is going to cure your blues, the only person that can cure your happiness is you. We've all heard I'm my own worst enemy well for many years I've been the most negative person in my life and now I can finally say I'm dropping all the negative aspects out of my life, so I will be happy with myself.

[koishii]

Good for you!

One saying I've tried to stick with is

the key to happiness is not to want what you don't have but to want what you've already got.

[Shinobie]

My key to happiness is happy pils because thats the only thing i have to lean on.Whenever u have nothing that makes u happy in ur life kind of like me then theres no way to be content with urself.When ive never had a gf,friends talk behind my back,people put me down,feel good at nothing,family sucks,my fellow adolescents put me down saying im ugly.and the fact that i just suck at life and i have nothing too look forward to except for working does not make me happy.Theres no way i can be happy.I mean how can i truly become possibly happy and confident so girls will liek me but there is nothing in my life at all that actually makes me truly happy?

[talo]

Theres no way i can be happy.I mean how can i truly become possibly happy and confident so girls will liek me but there is nothing in my life at all that actually makes me truly happy?

 

Dear Shinobie,

 

Have you observed that there are two types of happiness.

 

One is the pleasure gained when something wanted is obtained/attained. This type of happiness is short lived as anything obtained/attained requires maintenance and can be lost.

 

The other is more of a mental attitude/openness. It perhaps could be called satisfaction or contentment or true-happiness. This does not mean/require that there is anything to be satisfied/contented/truly-happy about/with.

 

Presumably you can think of (perhaps an imaginary) someone worse off than yourself. Imagine if you were the most 'worst off' person in the world. How do you imagine that person would 'get on' without true-happiness?

 

It is observed that one's situation in life has nothing to do with that one's happiness. There can be a 'glow' from the most 'unfortunate' soul. It is the glow of contentment/true-happiness that is attractive.

 

So when you say "there is nothing in my life at all that actually makes me truly happy", there is nothing in anyone's life that makes them truly happy. Being truly happy is being contented whatever is or is not in one's life.

 

It could be said "All things come to those who wait (in the glow of contentment/true-happiness)".

Who knows what this attraction may attract .

 

 

And thank you Borashi for starting this thread.