So Torn...

[babyblueeyesuk]

Let me tell you a little story... I met my girlfriend on the internet about 3 years ago and I moved to live with her about two years ago.

She introduced me to her friend (who was/is a lesbian) just after we moved in and we got on like a house on fire. I thought to myself at the time "she's really nice" and thought no more of it. Her friend then moved in, and the more time that we spent together, the more something was growing inside me. Unknown to my girlfriend, we did get a little touchy-feely, but nothing really serious happened. Then me, my girlfriend and her friend ended up messing about one night and ended up almost having a threesome. Nothing really happened until earlier this year. My and my girlfriend were going though a bad patch where each of us wanted to take different directions; she wanted to have kids and I didn't feel that I was ready for them, or even if I wanted to have them with her. Anyways, her friend was staying with us again and the old feeling were surfacing, but this time stronger than before. Then a few night before New Years, I blurted out that I thought I was falling for her. Now I expected her to just dismiss it out of hand, but all she said to me was try not to think about and "take cold showers". Now, this was not a clear-cut answer for me, so pushed the issue and she told me that she felt somethiing for me too. However, if we were to get together, she didn't want to do it at the expense of her friendship with my girlfriend

And so the flirting got worse and we made some plans. My girlfriend knew about the flirting and I suspect she also knew then I fancied her mate, but the full extent to it. It even got to the point where her mate's mum commented that she thought that me and her daughter were the item.

Then, one morning my girlfriend was looking through my phone and found text messages that me and her friend had been sending and she was devastated. I managed to persuade her that I was just just flirting and that it was nothing more serious than that.

Since then things have changed; my girlfriend doesn't trust me or her friend fully, and her friend seems to have gone off me too.

My girlfriend worships the ground that I walk on and she does everything for me, but I'm not sure whether I am truly happy with her. I feel smothered sometimes I seem to have more in common with her mate.

Then on the other hand, her friend is now blowing hot and cold on me. One day, she making strong hints that she wants to be with me, and then on others, she's cold and distant. She says that she feel guilty for like me, when I'm her friend's man, and that if I'm going to leave my girlfriend, it shouldn't be for her only. I can't understand this because she won't tell me how she REALLY feels until my relationship with my girlfriend has ended.

I think that I'm in love with her, but I also think that she is toying with me. My head is saying that she is messing me about, but the heart is, saying "take a chance". Now that she knows how I feel, she's got me round her little finger. I don't even know whether to trust her anymore. I heard rumors, though my girlfriend that she's sleeping with her married boss. I asked her whether it was true, and she said that it was, but it isn't now. Now I've heard her saying that she might not be stop herself having sex with him if they go away on a job together.

I've told her that if doesn't like me anymore to let me know, but all that she tell me is that she doesn't know how she feels, and it's driving me mad! I try to let her go, but she draws me back again and again.

My relationship with my girlfriend has improved a lot now and now I'm confused...

Should I leave my girlfriend to truly be happy; even if it's to be with her friend, or if I can't be with the one that I love, love the one that I'm with?

 

[LifeIsGood]

Hey man, Im not as old as you and have not gotten as seriouse with a girl as you have to moved in with her. But take it from me regardless of age.. You never want to have to say "I love her but im not IN love with her" Its not something that you want to live the rest of your life thinking, like what if i did this or what if i did that, Take advantage of situations while your in the prime of your life, make decisions that will keep you happy. The point of life is to be happy, You want to spend your life with the person you love above all others, now if your current girlfriend seems to you like someone just to be with, i say go for her friend. BUT thats only if your in love with her, not just for sex or anything like that. In the end its your decision but thats my view on the situation. Good luck bud