How does one accidentally home-wrecks?

[MadxMythMadame]

My boyfriend and I recently got back together, despite the prior 4 months of being broken up because of his fear of long-distant, military relationship. He just came home and we've realized quickly that we're clearly not the same couple we were 4 months ago. We've agreed and understand that it's a fresh new start for us and that there's no way of going back to where we used to be. It's a risk, but it's what we're willing to go through.

 

My question is how does one keep the relationship from drifting? I know that we're not going to be able to talk, see each other, writer letters, e-mail, ETC. very much. We've had a LDR for a year prior, but it was different because we were able to talk every night and see each other more often. How do LDR last from a few words and touches?

 

PS It sounds like such a broad question, but I don't know how else to ask.

[Moneypenny]

My question is how does one keep the relationship from drifting? I know that we're not going to be able to talk, see each other, writer letters, e-mail, ETC. very much. We've had a LDR for a year prior, but it was different because we were able to talk every night and see each other more often. How do LDR last from a few words and touches?

 

It's not a broad question at all, it's a very good one.

 

In the days before mobile phones and internet I had a 6000 mile LDR with my boyfriend for 18 months. Our only communication was snail mail and very brief monthly phone calls (because of the cost). Our letters were jammed packed with special words, poetry, you name it. We sent photographs and cassette recordings of one way conversations, and small light-hearted gifts. All these things were precious, in that you could re-read the letters and listen to the cassettes over and over, and over again.

 

It's just a question of adapting to and accepting the situation for what it is. If you both love each other, anything is possible.

[Oneironaut]

My LD boyfriend and I haven't seen each other in over a year and a half...does that lessen our emotions? Not at all. Sadly, our finances simply haven't allowed us to be able to make the 2,500 mile trek to see each other since our last meeting. But we talk regularly on Skype/webcam, we text constantly, and we chat on AIM...anyone who thinks we are in a fantasy relationship just because we haven't spent time together recently hasn't a clue, lol...after almost 2 and 1/2 years, we are well aware of each other's faults and shortcomings, as well as our needs and wants.

 

I dunno, I guess it just comes down to the depth of the feelings people have for each other. I know damn well that I'm not going to find anyone like him locally, nor do I even want to try, because I love him, and only him. Love doesn't recognize distance limitations, and I will wait for as long as it takes to be with him, because I am a patient person, and the eventual rewards will be worth it.

[Moneypenny]

My question is how does one keep the relationship from drifting? I know that we're not going to be able to talk, see each other, writer letters, e-mail, ETC. very much. We've had a LDR for a year prior, but it was different because we were able to talk every night and see each other more often. How do LDR last from a few words and touches?

 

It's not a broad question at all, it's a very good one.

 

In the days before mobile phones and internet I had a 6000 mile LDR with my boyfriend for 18 months. Our only communication was snail mail and very brief monthly phone calls (because of the cost). Our letters were jammed packed with special words, poetry, you name it. We sent photographs and cassette recordings of one way conversations, and small light-hearted gifts. All these things were precious, in that you could re-read the letters and listen to the cassettes over and over, and over again.

 

It's just a question of adapting to and accepting the situation for what it is. If you both love each other, anything is possible.

[Moneypenny]

SPOT ON! It definitely does come down to the depth of feeling that a couple share between them.

[MadxMythMadame]

Oops, Just realized that I have the wrong title and can't figure out how to change

 

Well, is it naive to think that love conquers all? Or is it pessimistic to think that there's more to a relationship other than love?

[Moneypenny]

Well, is it naive to think that love conquers all?

 

No. In your situation and from what you've described, why would it be naive? It will however, depend on the strength of the people involved - how far are you willing to go? Is it something worth waiting for?

 

Or is it pessimistic to think that there's more to a relationship other than love?

 

I don't understand what you mean by this question.