Help! The Relationship factor!

[takt]

I need help in deciding whether to make love to my gf of two weeks. She seems ready about it, but I'm wondering if she is out for the sex or really cares about our relationship and taking it slow.

 

I guess the biggest thing is whether the relationship will suffer or flourish from this. It's not like I don't like sex, but this time around, I'd really like a relationship to last and not be based entirely on sex.

 

I know I should talk to her about it, and I will. But I was really just wondering what everyone else thinks?

[ComputerGuy]

The best way to know for sure, is to not do it right now and see what she does. Tell her exactly what you just told us, but remind her it has nothing to do with her specifically. If she leaves you, well you know for sure, if not, then all the better for you. Good luck

[dpressedone89]

i dont know, two weeks isnt very long give it at least a month before you guys sleep together I agree with ComputerGuy the best way to find out is to not do it now and see how she reacts

[Roffler]

5 one-on-one outings is the rule. The rules are lies, don't listen to that.

 

If she cared about the relationship, withholding sex will not be a problem. But, when do males withhold sex?

[ComputerGuy]

But, when do males withhold sex?

 

I resent that LOL

[Day_Walker]

You are looking at this situation the wrong way. This girl wants to have sex with you and she has only been your gf for two weeks? Take a look at this situation, what if she does just want sex? is that really gonna hurt you? As long as you know thats what she wants then you wont have a problem. Have fun with the situation and live in the moment, it seems that this female doesnt want a long term relationship she just wants to have some fun, so why dont you have some fun too and enjoy then fun times you will have together. You dont have to worry about the typical relationship woes with this female because you are friends and you are having sex. Once the relationship has ended you werent hurt by being it you just had fun with the situation and let it be what it was going to be.

[Francis]

Sometimes, women want to have sex right away because:

 

1. to consolidate the relationship asap, because they like you too much and are afraid of losing you; OR

 

2. they want to entrap you if you are a very good party (rich, professional, etc.) and they know that sex is a very effective way to "catch" a man.

 

If this woman is nervous around you, makes mistakes, is inconsistent, etc. then she probably likes you a lot. This does not mean you should have sex right away. It is always a good idea to wait a bit, in order to find out whether you are really compatible before attaching to the wrong person. (Every time people have sex, they release hormones that make them attach emotionally with whoever they are having sex).

 

If the woman is suave, she is making all the right moves, never makes a mistake, displays perfect qualities at all times, then you should certainly be more careful and get to know her better.

[June4life]

Two weeks seems a little soon to me. If you are concerned about whether she is ready, then wait until she comes on to you. Then you know she's ready!

[Shizzle]

its was 9 months before my and my fiance has sex..

 

depends on what you want out of it too

[Celadon]

Hello. My advice is: If you want a relationship, then have a relationship and don't base your decisions on what others think you should be doing. You sound like you're ready to build something long-lasting. Good for you.

 

It's perfectly fine to tell her you want to know her and her to know you as a person first, rather than engage in sex like it's an amusement. Even well-intentioned people can start wanting the gratification of sex more than they want to depth of a relationship.

 

Yes, she may be fantastically attracted to you right now, physically, but you want that attraction to be through and through, I would think. She'll still be attracted to you if you wait.

 

I agree with the others who say that she'll show her true colors if you wait. If she's really young, though, she may not be thinking about much besides sex (that is -- "relationship equals sex"). In that case, you'd have to ask yourself how close you could be with her, emotionally. Well, good luck and let us know how it goes.