Feeling Incapable

[notgivingup]

Hi everyone,

 

This is about my second month working as an intervention specialist subsitute, and I am feeling like I am not qualified, like I am incapable at what I do, like I am no longer needed (as if my work skills are no longer needed). I feel like what I am doing is not enough and it eats at me from the inside out.

 

You see I work with a special ad class of 7 high school students who need extra help at school. There are 2 who are especially hard to work with, who will not and does not answer to me. In which case I have to ask for extra help from other coworkers who work with me. And when that happens I feel like I am incapable of the work that I do. I beat myself up because of that.

 

I know that my coworkers and the students have no problem working with me most of the time and that they even enjoy working with me most of the time. I know that I am not as experienced as they are, and the students might not answer to me as much as they do to them just because I am brand new or the students are just like that to begin with. I do help the teacher out whenever I take notes in class or make work for the students to do. I know that my contribution at work is appreciated.

 

I get disrespected at work and now this. This is my first job and I feel like I am a failure because I am depending on my coworkers so much all of the time. I am going through such a difficult time right now and I just feel like I will break down in any second.

 

Has anyone ever been in my position before?

 

How do you suggest I deal with it?

 

What should I do in order to deal with it?

 

Any feedback, advice, suggestion is welcomed and appreciated.