checkmedown Posted February 18, 2011 Share Posted February 18, 2011 My girlfriend of two years left me exactly one year ago and I still love her. After 3 weeks of begging intermittedly I finally went cold turkey no contact. She broke it on a couple of occasions over the next 5 months but whilst she said she wouldn't close her mind to the possiblity of a reconciliation one day, she was still furious with me about the relationship's failure. I kissed another woman and she didn't trust me anymore. Our relationship at the time was also under some pressure since I was working long hours. Not a day has gone by when I haven't regretted what I did wrong - I knew she had trust issues as well. I can still remember our last phone call. She cried and said she loved me and that our relationship had made her past boyfriends look like nothing. Then she got mad and asked why I ruined our relationship when she loved me so much and hung up angry. She then left the country the next week. She is still abroad and we haven't spoken for 7 months now, a year since we split in total. About 4 months ago I heard through a friend of a friend that she had started casually going on dates with a guy and as of today they have been 3 months officially together. None of my friends know how much I am hurting inside, only my mother and brother. She finishes university this summer and may come back here, stay there or go back to her home country. Not a day has gone by in the last 6 months I haven't thought about her but I have kept up the strict no contact. I want to email her and remind her of my existence but would that just ruin my future chances? I know she is gone and I don't really have any chances. Link to comment
muchisimo Posted February 18, 2011 Share Posted February 18, 2011 I recently started emailing my ex. It's been very nice to talk to her again, even though we're far away and won't see each other. We also haven't spoken about getting back together and I don't think it's on either of our minds. I have no desire to start seeing her again, I just wanted to talk to her again. My experience is that when a relationship is over for several months, it will continue to be over for the rest of each person's life. I think the opposite is very, very rare. Link to comment
checkmedown Posted February 18, 2011 Author Share Posted February 18, 2011 Fair enough. Thank you for reading and replying. Link to comment
muchisimo Posted February 18, 2011 Share Posted February 18, 2011 I"m sorry that my response wasn't very sensitive. I understand that moving on is incredibly difficult, however I'm not really qualified to give you advice on coping as I'm having a rocky time doing so right now. I hope you can find others who will be able to help you Link to comment
checkmedown Posted February 18, 2011 Author Share Posted February 18, 2011 Don't worry my friend, all the best through your own rocky endeavours. Link to comment
freiabereinsam Posted February 18, 2011 Share Posted February 18, 2011 May I ask what caused your ex to become so furious and end the relationship? If she is currently in a new relationship, I'm not sure it's the best time to get in touch. She might reply and be willing to stay in touch via email, talk about her new boyfriend, etc., but if you are hoping to reconcile/get back together, I don't think that is too likely. Ideally, what do you hope to gain from reminding her of your existence (as you put it)? Link to comment
checkmedown Posted February 18, 2011 Author Share Posted February 18, 2011 I kissed another woman and she no longer trusted me. If I contacted her it would be with the hope it planted a seed in her mind that started her thinking about me and wondering if she could give me a second chance. Also just to show her I still think about her and care. I am guessing if she has a boyfriend the only thing I would achieve is ending up 'friend-zoning' myself? Link to comment
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