Can it work if there is 22 year gap?

[somanaomi]

he has a 25yr old daughter?

my dad was 65 and was with my stepmum who was 40. 25 year gap. like catherine zeta jones and um that dude.

[TrueHeart]

I'm 23, and my boyfriend (recently) is 44. He does have sons at 21 and 20- and I know that the relationship slightly bothers them, if not a lot. However, they said their issue is with their father not me. I've known the family for over 8 years.

 

It CAN be more difficult because older men tend to have more 'baggage' (lack of a better term) than younger men.. i.e, kids, ex-spouses. All I can say is that I NEVER expected him of all people. I've dated men 10 years my senior, and of my own age... and Its all about how 'relationship savvy' one is..

 

Age is just a number if you connect on a more intellectual and emotional level. Worked for me so far. Not to mention that I'm completely and totally attracted to him physically. But once that fades, all there is left is the love that remains... and THATS the strength right there....!

[Yorkrose23]

Never let anyone make you feel like you don't deserve what you want.

If you really love this man, that's all that matters. You are of age, so who cares about the difference? Age is only a state of mind. As long as you can agree upon how to live and neither of you is a hinderence to the other, then I say go for it.

I'd say to be careful about the workplace situation. That can become a sticky issue if you're not careful.

Good luck

[TrueHeart]

I couldn't have said it better...

[Mermaid]

he has a 25yr old daughter?

my dad was 65 and was with my stepmum who was 40. 25 year gap. like catherine zeta jones and um that dude.

 

I think she meant 25-year-old girlfriend.

[irish chick]

If you really have strong feelings for him then go for it. My last boyfriend was 17 years older then me and it worked out great. I broke up with him recently but it had nothing to do with our age difference.

[chicken]

hey i agree with what others have said if you really love this guy then go for it!! also that people cannot tell you what to do and how to feel!!! i am in a relationship with a guy that is 17yrs older than me!! i am verry much in love with him vise versa the only problem i really have is that most of my family do not like the situation and he never gets invited to family events and stuff. my parents hate his guts. we are living together. so if you do want to go ahead with it i just want to say be prepared if your family dont like the situation. it can get hard at times, but with me my bf is there and he picks me back up again!!

good luck

[dreamweaverdude]

LaraJenkin said it best earlier....

 

HOW MANY Times do you find true love? If you find it... hold on..... regardless of there age. I trult believe i'd rather spend a short time with the one I truly love, and be in total happiness .. than a lifetime with someone I just settled for because they were closer to my age.

 

Granted it is tougher.. when he starts playing Eric Clapton's Layla and getting down and you go.. who the hell is CLapton....... lol... there are differences... language, slang, and as someone else said generational issues but still IT CAN WORK. If the two of you want it to.. and to be perfectly honest... as long as the two of you are of age.. and you are.. it is no one elses business...... if he makes you happy... then go for it...... knowing the risks involved.

[TrueHeart]

Dream has a very VERY great point. I've been with my boyfriend for maybe a few weeks officially, but we've been seeing eachother exclusively since Halloween. I would have to say its been a miraculous few weeks.

 

I agree that the family issues are probably the only hang-up right now. Both his and my family officially do not know that we are 'dating' exclusively. Right now, the timing is very bad due to that he's in the midst of a lengthy divorce. I already know that my family would eventually warm up to the idea that he and I are seeing eachother, in fact, my older siblings already know and are ok with it.

 

It has been different these past few weeks. He's the oldest man I've ever dated before, and it seems like a whole new world. I feel more connected to him than anyone I've ever been with. I've always had long-term relationships that lasted more than 2 years on the average...

 

I feel confident that his/my family will eventually be ok with us dating. But again, the timing may not EVER be right, per say, but there is a point where it would be more appropriate.. I guess I just have to accept the lesser of 2 evils.

[amanda09]

forget him there is no way that u r gonna wat to be with him when he is all wrenckaly and u are still young and pretty

[TrueHeart]

Amanda-

 

To be quite frank, thats a rather closed-minded way of thinking about the scenerio.

[Amethyst]

Amanda-

 

To be quite frank, thats a rather closed-minded way of thinking about the scenerio.

 

Very true; but, in her defense, it stands to reason that a 14-year-old would have that opinion.

[TrueHeart]

Much agreed, Amethyst.. Much agreed.

[socrates]

I am 27, he is 49. We work togeather - can it work or should i forget about it?

 

Yes it can, its the love that bounds the two together.

[Rilas]

Amanda-

 

To be quite frank, thats a rather closed-minded way of thinking about the scenerio.

 

Very true; but, in her defense, it stands to reason that a 14-year-old would have that opinion.

 

Hey! I was 14 not too long ago! it doesn't matter, my opinion is different. I think it could definitly work if you're very willing to try. My moto, "Where there's a will, there's a way''. But I do believe you have to seriously consider all of the questions everyone has given you to ask yourself and him. They could be the deal breakers. To me, love is boundless and it can conquer all. Even a large age gap. So if you believe it can, want it to, and are willing to work at it, I think it could definitly turn out well. Good luck!

[littlelady148]

Well Im a 63 yr old woman and am with a 33 yr old man and have been for over 3 years now. For us it works, for others Im sure it wouldnt . If you have things in common, enjoy each others company, have the same beliefs and dont care what others think, then I say go for it. And by the way, there IS sex after 60 LOL

[TrueHeart]

I am happy for all those who are open-minded enough to give the older, or younger, person a try. Again, as Rilas put it.. Love is boundless.

 

I have almost been with my new BF for almost 3 months now, officially, and I have to tell you they've been the best 3 months in my entire life! Its nice having someone who appreciates you and loves you the way you've always dreamed. I don't regret my past relationships however, I just used them to really find out what I did and didn't want... Just the other day, a coworker of mine was telling me that there is a 37 year age gap between her and her husband, and they're perfectly happy.

 

Just goes to show you that anything can happen at the most unexpected times! We're already talking about marriage!!! Things are being taken slow, but I know that once everything comes-- it will all be natural. I cannot picture my future without him.... He's the only man I want to be with, and the only man I can't live without....

[littlelady148]

Congratulations TrueHeart...............and I agree with you completely and wish you much happiness. When someone is really in love, they love the person for who they are, not their age.

[Rilas]

Ya know what? I love this site. So many of the people here are so supportive and nice to each other. They all have such open minds and can actually listen to what someone is saying and give a proper response back, whether they agree or not. I just think that is so cool. TrueHeart, I wish u the best of luck and I hope your happiness continues to grow w/this man.

[TheEvil1isDara]

I am 27, he is 49. We work togeather - can it work or should i forget about it?

8) I am the taboo breaker of the 2000's

The Demi moore if you will.........he is alot younger than me......Carol Burnett is my hero! she married a guy more than half her age, he was there when she lost her daughter to cancer....

We are there for each other and when the chips are down, that is what matters! 5 years later, we are still there for each other.

[tosing]

Just think 30 and 50 if that makes you feel any better.

 

Here's where it may be a problem:

 

He's only going to get older faster. This may lead to sexual dysfunction if he is not healthy. Also, you're in your "good years" age range. Is he the "one" for you. If not, get with someone else.

 

I was once married to someone 10 years my senior. I found that often times we couldn't relate when it came to music or pop-culture type conversations. Are the things you're into things he can relate to or converse about?

 

Also, does he look like your dad? If so, does this bother you?

 

Usually men this age want a woman who is fresh with no baggage. A woman his own age wouldn't put up with him, or he needs a trophy at this point in his career. It may be good to find out if he finds women his age attractive.

 

Also, make sure you want to really be involved with this guy before things get real serious - especially if you work with him.

[g790403]

I think this is going to work as long as both of you guys love each other. My parents have a 20 years age gap too but it worked out perfectly fine with them. My father is still very energetic and love my mother. Please don't let age stop you.

[amtheredoingthat]

...by the posts that immediately said this would never work. I guess I expect more "support" on a site where most of us are in an age-gap relationship or have been in one.

 

I would concentrate on the posts that present the problems that could or most likely would come up, and decide if you are OK with all that. THAT will give you your answer.