littlelady148

My question is why bother? It sounds like you really arent into it but think you should. Maybe thats why it isnt working for you. Otherwise just keep at it until you cum. Why do you stop after a minute or so if nothing happens.... Id think if you really LIKED it the feeling alone would keep you going at it until you got the desired results. Its not a LAW that you have to masturbate you know. LOL

Oh boy I must be drinking or something I didnt see that you were only 15. Let me just say that at that age, 5 years can be a really big gap in all ways and then there is the legal issue as well. If you were 20 and he was 25 THEN the gap would not be so great , but for now, you cold remain friends and who knows in a few years maybe things could take a turn, but I advise you against heading into something serious where sex is involved. It is NOT LEGAL mainly but there are other issues about maturity and responsibility that also can cause giant problems.

Congratulations TrueHeart...............and I agree with you completely and wish you much happiness. When someone is really in love, they love the person for who they are, not their age.

opps sorry, I didnt read some of the other posts . You say she is cold sexually but wasnt that way at first, so SOMETHING has happened. I had to laugh at your comment about when someone pisses on your fire its hard to get it lit again. SO TRUE and MAYBE thats how she feels too. Have you ever cheated on her ? I can tell you that takes the wifes sex drive from 10 to 0 in no time flat. Somehow I get the impression you arent really so sure you want to end it, just change HER ways and it might be better. That could be and maybe YOU could use a tune up yourself. Why arent you willing to go to councelling with her? Apparently whoevers fault it is things are the way they are, at least it seems she wants to look for answers . Why dont you?

I dont know what you want your wife to say. Apparently she has tried to make this marriage work since you mentioned telling her you werent interested in councelling ( I assume she was). You told her you just want out, so what is there left for her to say to you anyway??? Get a lawyer, and start the ball rolling if thats what you want to do. Her communication doesnt seem like the problem here to me, it seems the problem is you dont want to work on this marriage or be married. Since your the one that wants the divorce why are you waiting for her to say something? Why dont you do the talking and tell her what you think would be fair and how you want to split things up etc and THEN maybe she will have something to say .

I agree with randy. I know couples with a 15-20 yr age gap that get along fine and others the same age as each other getting a divorce.

Could be he just wants a "drinking buddy"

You say you moved so I take it you arent seeing each other now?? You just talk on the phone or computer, is that it? Either way, I would say to just take things one day at a time and see how your relationship develops. As far as the age gap, 5 years is not that large . Does he still live at home? Does he have a job? What about you? Can you give a few more details?

Well Im a 63 yr old woman and am with a 33 yr old man and have been for over 3 years now. For us it works, for others Im sure it wouldnt . If you have things in common, enjoy each others company, have the same beliefs and dont care what others think, then I say go for it. And by the way, there IS sex after 60 LOL

Was this guy sleeping or something??? I know a guy can get erect when asleep but other than that I cant see how he got raped without knowing it.

well Im 63 and my boyfriend is 32. we have been living together for 2 years now and its working just fine. I think its because we talked on the internet for a year before even meeting so we really got to know each other from the inside out and not judge our feelings by looks or age. Seems to be working for us, and NO he isnt after my money cause I dont have any LOL

simple you dont TASTE sperm when he lets it go when your f*****g You DO taste it giving oral. so if you dont like the taste you wouldnt be interested in swallowing. not so difficult to figure really

I think I have been too harsh bad habit. Maybe its because it makes me mad when your a caring person amd yet , to some, its like you have a big sign on your head SUCKER. Ive been there myself so maybe thats why I get so fired up reading your posts LOL You know, if you only have had a couple dates and are not very experienced with women, dont feel bad that things go wrong or you misjudge someone. You learn as you go, and although there are those who see you as someone they can use , there will also be those who see the kind of man they can respect, and love and who will treat them the same in return. The fact is there are just some women and men out there that WANT the drama and cant accept a nice guy other than someone to take advantage of. If the girl hasnt said anything about wanting a relationship or doesnt act like you two are a couple.... then you could just be pushing too fast and being too possessive too. Maybe the best thing would just be to back off with the questions, lay back and dont rush things. If the ex is still in the pic and she sees him (friends? I dont think so, but...) lol just date if she wants.... see what happens. If she cant get to the point where you know she is in your corner then just move on. There are lots of girls out there, and you will meet someone else. Dont give up but dont make it your goal in life. Do things, get out, have some fun with friends, and I think if this girl really wants a relationship with you YOU will know. Your gut feelings are usually right, and Id go with them, if things dont get better. BIG HUGS RELAX lol

I was reading the letter you sent to her and you said.................We have different interests, and potentially little in common. These things alone shouldn't make things difficult, though they don't help matters either. I really have to argue that point that these things wouldnt or shouldnt make a difference. They DO make a difference in my experience. I mean after the initial "thrill" of a person MAN if you have nothing in common as far as interests, or much else, what would you have??? What would you talk about, what would you do together ? I dont know, after reading your last post, and the way she talked with her ex, I have more questions myself than answers. First of all if some guy beats you up and throws you out, why would she even be talking to him in the first place ? I agree with you, why wouldnt she just say I dont care to go out with you or see you again ? ( obviously she isnt closing the door with him) As for asking her what she wants from you and not getting an answer, .... she gave you somewhat of an answer saying " you make her feel like nobody else has" Im curious though, has she said she likes you a lot, she enjoys being with you, she wants a relationship with you??? Honestly my gut reaction is that she has a lot of problems, and isnt ready for a nice guy except to make this ex jealous maybe in hopes they can get back together and he will treat her better. Maybe there is a lot I dont know here, so I shouldnt say that but from what you have written thats just what I get out of it. How long did she go with this ex? Did she have sex with him? If so, could be in a twisted way she figures by not having xex with you , shes not cheating on this guy????? Oh brother, this is so messed up. I guess what Id like to say is your making it easy to be used. What do you want from me? What should I do? ( that kind of thing) What about you??? Why cant you say to her, LOOK, I like you but Im not playing these games. If you wanted to be with me you would have told the ex either you had someone else, or you didnt want to see him again......YOU DIDNT so IM OUTTA HERE You think things over and decide how you feel about me and about your ex..... If you decide you would like to give things a sincere try with me, and you want to talk openly and honestly with me, give me a call. Oh boy that was cruel wasnt it?. Guess its the mood Im in but its such a waste of time to sit and wait on someone to MAKE UP THEIR MIND Its so selfish of them to treat you like you have no life .... and should just stay on HOLD cause they want to keep you around , just in case. Hope Im all wrong about this really...but I say what I think and thats what I think right now/

I just wanted to add one thing here because you said In truth, I was that miserable person begging for my guy. He says it made him see how in love I really was to be able to show my feelings so openly. Im glad this worked for you but in a lot of cases all that your begging would do would be to let a guy know he could treat you anyway he wanted , and even if you fought all he would have to do is lay back, and sooner or later, youd come running back for more. So, your right I guess , each case is different. Im glad things worked out for you. I dont know why you split up or what went on, but Im just curious if your boyfriend made any moves to get back together to show how much he loved you? I hope it was mutual.

hi, First of all you cant TELL a person or convince her you will not be jealous unless you DO IT. You cant promise to not be jealous unless you have been able to change the way you think and reactt. If you think the same way as you always have, sooner or later you will act the same as you always have. She will ONLY see your sincere and have changed when you HAVE changed and are not being jealous. Thats about it. Meanwhile, what is it that goes through your mind when you get in one of those jealous moods?? Does this girl do anything at all to make you feel you might lose her or she is interested in someone else or anything??? Sounds like its just you getting jealous for no reason...is that the case? Its not easy to live with someone or love them for long when they are always questioning you or accusing you or thinking the worst of you, when your doing nothing to deserve it. You could have a serious insecurity problem , be one of those people that always sees the glass half empty rather than half full, or the kind that cant enjoy anything good in their life cause they are so focused on what bad will probably happen to ruin it. You might need to go for some help to sort things out so you can get to the root of why your reacting like this. Once you see things differently you will be able to ACT differently. Work on what to do about YOUR problem, now and you wont have to worry about how to convince someone you have changed. It will show.

oh how well I remember this line " he said if i didnt then i didnt relly love him." Do you hear anything in there that says concern for YOU??? its all about HIM. My answer is " if YOU love me, then you wouldnt want me to do something Im not ready for" All situations are not the same but in my case at your age when the boy of my dreams said that to me...... I went along with it. I had visions of us together forever from then on. We were in love and had done the most intimate thing together. Well, next day at school he never even looked at me, muttered hi and went his way. From that day on, he called and came over ( for sex) which I supplied , making excuses for his avoiding me in public or acknowledging we were a couple. He was just shy. NO he was just using me and it hurt when he took someone else to a dance or other events and not me. I finally wised up but there was a lot of pain I went through by doing something I wasnt ready to do just to PROVE to him how much i cared. Did he try and prove HE carred??? NOOOO I say DONT DO IT and if he cant accept that move on , you deserve someone who loves you not someone who wants you to PROVE you love them.

Sounds good to me. I agree with you, COMMUNICATION is where its at or your nowhere. Nothing wrong with trying to communicate and get a few things straight. You were tactful and to the point and yet did it in a non threatening, non critical way that I cant see her taking offense to. To ignore something that bothers you only creates a bigger problem and the other person isnt even aware there is a problem or something you want to understand or want answers to. TALK TALK TALK you seem to be doing that quite well in my opinion. I just hope she is as willing to do the same . Good luck and let us know what happens.

You have all been so nice and I thank you. I kind of expected some BOOOO's and mutter muttering LOL BIG HUGS to you all for the acceptance. I know its a pretty far out relationship, but I wouldnt trade it for the world. Glad to meet you all.

Sounds more like the "reason" is not his age and the problem is more about jumping into a marriage with someone you say you didnt know very well for one thing. Secondy I dont hear anything about marrying this guy because you loved him, his personality, his humor etc....all I hear is he was perfect for you and then you say "I thought I could work on his self esteem, show him how he could please me sexually, and give him a lot of praise. I was very patient with him. I also wonder why he would get married to someone he hardly knows . Sounds like neither of you had sex before you married, and both came from marriages where sex was a problem because of the other person, supposedly. He said before you married that his sex drive was normal,but NOW he says he never thinks about sex and has very little sex drive. Maybe that is normal to him.... something getting to know each other a lot better might have revealed. So many things going on here and possibilites and reasons for all your troubles in this marriage. First, I dont even know if you love this guy or if he loves you. Sex is a big part of things as you said, and it seems you didnt have it in your first marriage, so maybe you were looking for reassurance that your still attractive and sexy with this guy. Who knows, maybe this guy is not ASEXUAL but Homosexual and in denial so he gets married again thinking it he could get turned on and it would be different this time with you, but he has found it isnt and the desire for a woman is still not there. I dont know. Id say if you BOTH want this to work, seek some councelling. Some couples dont have sex due to a physical problem or something but they still love each other and things about each other. I just dont hear anything coming from you post that says you have much in common with this guy or ever did. Maybe you just didnt go into all that, but Im just not sure what you want here... some advice on how to get this guy hot? Sounds like youve tired it all. Maybe he would react more to cuddling, a thougtful gesture like bringing home cookies or something he conciders a treat, maybe a back rub, maybe just sitting and talking. Sometimes if a person has issues sexually, making sex and their performance the major concern you have, can make them feel even less interested and fearful of failure etc. COMMUNICATION is where its at. You did try to talk to him, but it was about YOU...didnt he find YOU sexy, didnt he get turned on by YOU etc. Maybe ask what he likes when he DOES have sex, what is it he doesnt like, did something happen perhaps to cause him to be turned off by the sexual act. Ask if he would like you to do anything like oral sex or using your hand and focus on what would make sex good to him..... ( for now) That might work..... if not and you cant get past this, get a divorce, but PLEASE dont rush into marriage next time

You keep saying you love this guy.I think it might help you see things more clearly if you would take a piece of paper and on one half, write down the things you LOVE and then on the other half list the things you dislike and that make you unhappy concerning your relationship with him. When you mentioned your big phone bill and how he only paid $300 my first thought is why did you continue the calls and allow the bill to get so high? All I can figure throughout your whole post is that youll do anything to keep this guy even if it costs you money, or worse yet your self respect. You are worth more than that. If your going to think your not " good enough" for him, your going to sink even lower in your next relationship. This guy sounds like a sex addict, and could even be married the way he hush hushes his calls saying his MOM wouldnt like it. He seems to find time to turn on the computer cam and have you perform sexual acts for him. Is he worried about his mom then? Most important, you know the truth yourself, I think. This guy shows you no respect, and is making no effort to make you feel special, loved, important, and you say yourself hes only interested in talking about sex with you or things to do with sex. Im sorry but he knows your past, your insecurities, your feelings of not being pretty enough etc and he knows your so desperate to have someone that he can treat you just about any way he wants and youll still be there hoping he calls or writes or something. In the meantime, you are miserable, unhappy, have no security in this relationship, and unfortunately thats all your going to have as long as you allow it to continue. I have been there myself and knowing the person I was with was a lowlife, when he cheated or treated me badly, I thought even less of myself because if I wasnt GOOD ENOUGH to hold him, I was pretty unlovable. WRONG THINKING. He is the lowlife, he can not deal with love and commitment or sincerity, he is a user and abuser...... so what am I even trying to make a relationship with someone like that??? I deserve better, and Im not going to lower my standards and settle for that. I know I know but I love him, he has times when he can be so nice, and maybe he would be different if I could just make him happy. CRAP Let me ask you this.... who are you with? That great guy you want to think he could be or the one who treats you like crap 90% of the time. Aside from this I can tell you , you could be the perfect woman and he would find fault and try and make you feel guilty and less than human. Thats the only way he can feel important. It has nothing to do with you trying harder or doing what he wants. He knows how he is treating you. and the more you go along with him, the more he just laughs at you and because you show so little respect for yourself, he only disrespects more, and you give him the go ahead to continue to treat you the way he does. Get out of this mess and forget looking for someone right now. Spend your time getting to know and like yourself. If you cant see why this relationship is totally wrong, Id say try and get some help because its doing nothing good for you. Maybe you need to look into why you choose to be in such a distructive relationship, or hurt yourself. Get these things straightened out before you get involved again. Look into what a loving relationship is . Its not each person trying to get what they need from someone else. Its more of a coming together complementing each other, sharing, caring, trust, loyalty, respect, commitment, communication, and wanting to make the other happy. ( it doesnt work when only one is the giver and the other just the taker) Just my thoughts, but I really hope you get out of this situation even if you think you love this guy. When you work through your self destructive behavior and learn to deal with things in a healthier way, and see your self for the person you are, your good qualities, things you can accomplish, etc, and you start liking yourself, believe me you wouldnt look at this guy you say you love if he was the only man on earth, because you would know you are worth more than what HE can offer.

I am in a very large age gap relationship but in spite of all the "what about this and what if that" questions we had to come to terms with, neither of us have any doubts or regrets. He is 31 and I am ( get ready) 63...and no hes not out for my money. I dont have any. We have been together now for over 2 years and still as sure as ever that we are a perfect match . I will be honest, it makes us both sad to think of the reality of the future. I would have loved to be his age so we could have many more years together , but like he says " I could die tomorrow and you could live 20 more years . We have NOW so lets enjoy it because to think of life without you is something I dont want to think about." So, thats what were doing. I couldnt be happier and we both feel we have found in each other that soulmate, friend, lover, companion, and person that most people wish they could find, but rarely do. We like the same things, have the same sense of humor, beliefs, dislikes etc, sex is great, we can talk about anything and everything, and just like being together.