Heartbroken, alone and waiting for her to come home.

[freaking out]

I had a wonderful relationship with the love of my life, but 3 years ago for some stupid reason I got it into my head that I was missing something and pushed her away to look for it. It hurt her terribly and she eventually fell out of love with me over time.

We have always remained very close and see each other all the time, and I convinced myself I was OK with friends. She unfortunately believed my delusion and pushed her love away as self preservation. And now she is seeing a new guy. This has killed me, and I now realise that I was extremly stupid and I cant stand knowing she has stopped loving me and its all my fault. I need to believe she hid her love for me from herself and she can find it again, and I hope this new guy will help her realise that.

 

I am handling it badly, and am going to seek counsling at her request. I almost turned into a stalker, but I know if I love her and want her to be around, she must be free to make her own desicion and have her space. I know she cannot look at her love for objectivly with me like this, so I will rebuild my life and hope this new boyfriend only shows her that she does love me. She has promised me that she does love me (we have 8 years of closeness - that doesnt go away in a hurry) and will remain open to regaining her love for me.

 

But she will not stop seeing this new guy of 1 month in order to give it a chance, which hurts me a lot. I just have to hope and pray and wait and show her I am the man she fell in love with.

[cruuk]

I feel for you, I really do. I'm in much the same situation except my ex is in another country so I just plain don't know if shes seeing someone else or not.

 

Either way, its heart wrenching to know how you feel for someone and not know if they even give you a second thought.

 

Keep being positive and friendly to be around, but just dont scare her or make her feel pressured, or you will lose any chance you ever had.

[butterflykiss04]

We all make mistakes we are only human and you have accepted yours I dont know if you let her know this but the reality is that she has moved on and you have to do the same I know it hurts but it does get better!

[freaking out]

I will not believe that she has gone forever. She has told me herself that doesnt know what she wants, from me or him. I WILL show her the man she fell in love with and with time I WILL let her see that what we had is not worth giving up on, even after all this time. I know its still there. She took a long time to open herself to me and let me know her innermost feelings, and it was a big step for her and I abused that. I believe that if she was able to do that, it wouldnt have gone away forever.

[RayKay]

I hope my ex comes to the same conclusion you did one day (that he was stupid for letting me go!) only before it is too late! He is having a quarter-life crisis right now, also felt like he was missing "something" and could not be in a relationship, though we are still pretty close.

 

I would say you cannot interfere with her current relationship, no matter how short it has been, however, it looks like it may come to an end anyway if he is already that jealous about your relationship with her. Give it time. In the meantime, be a friend, show her she can trust you again.