Not really wanting to be the consolation prize...

[saren]

I was seeing a guy this spring, who, one day, disappeared off the face of the earth. He just stopped returning my calls. Stopped answering the phone.

 

I figured it out, and eventually let it drop, and became very bitter.

 

Then, last week, I get this message on my machine. There was a lot of cellular interference, but I gathered the gist of it.

 

He had gotten back together with his ex-girlfriend before me, but that they'd broken up, and how sorry he was for not phoning me and telling me what was going on. He just kept on going with the "so very very sorry" and I sat there stunned.

 

I didn't call back, because I had nothing to say to him, and I didn't want to give him the impression that it's OK for him to treat me this way... But now, I'm thinking about it, because it doesn't seem like I've been able to do any better.

How do you not be bitter?

[lady00]

you deserve better than what he did. maybe he's just a jerk but maybe he really is sorry. maybe you should hear him out.

[TrueHeart]

Don't ever think that you cannot do better. Never settle for 2nd. Though his call is a little late, and admirable at that (took a lot og guts)-- you're 100, no, 150% correct that you don't want him thinking that its ok to just do that to him.

 

He walked away from you, remember? NOT the other way around. Don't return the phone call, or anything like that.. Why give him the satisfaction, when all you know he's going to just pine and pail over how sorry he is... Good, let him be-- what he did was aweful, and he deserves what he gets. It was rude, uncouth and completely uncalled for. Why wouldn't he tell you right off that he just got back together his his X, instead of avoiding you like the plague? Says a lot for his character, and should say a lot to you on how he thought of YOU'RE character.... How insulting.

 

About being bitter, DON'T.. You got the better deal, love. You're away from someone who obviously wasn't confident enough in thinking you were adult enough in handling a situation, so he took the option away from you and just "forgot" about you... like you were yesterday's newspaper. I would, however, still feel a little insulted but by all means, not bitter. Take some time and do something for yourself... Accept he made his choice, and you've made yours LOOONG before his phone call ever came... You never know, he could have been calling from the men's bathroom while out on a date with her.... Never know.. but seems feasible, doesn't it?

 

Go bowling, hang out with friends... and go about your life as you did before that phone call ever did... but be happy about it.. You finally got the closure you needed.... now move on!