Wife talking to ex-boyfriend and lied about it???

[nicknick43]

I have been in my second marriage for 2 months now and found out today that my wife has been talking to an ex-boyfriend of hers. She at first told me an "alias" name then told me it was a guy named mike, but not either one of her ex's named mike. She even put him on the phone with me and he lied to me about who he was too. Also she had him come over as a "friend" and they went out and supposedly talked for an hour and a half. Everytime our relationship is the slightest bit rocky she walks away and calls him immediatle. My first wife cheated on me and I just see this going the same route even though she professes that they are just good friends. He has aslo just broken up with his girlfriend conveniently and her intimacy level has gone considerably down. I don't know what to think, I love her but I can't trust her after all these lies and I am not really sure what his or her real intentions are. PLEASE HELP!!! I want to leave before I get cheated on again .

[hurtbylove]

I'm sorry but honestly it sounds like a really bad situation you have on your hands.

 

How long have you known your wife for?

 

She won't outwardly say that she still likes/loves her ex because that would immediately make her the "bad guy". But all the signs you gave are pretty obvious.

 

The lack of intimacy.

The lying behind your back about who he is.

Her running to him with problems

 

I believe that you love her but you don't deserve to be treated like this.

 

Confrontation with her or him will likely result in denials, accusations of not trusting her. It'll be ugly, she'll never openly admit it.

 

You don't deserve this happening to you.

[brokenpogostick]

i agree with the above post, what's she's doing to you is crap. you're her husband, she should be running to you with problems, you're her knight in shining armor...not this scrub she's hanging out with. you're married, you deserve the truth, the two of you should be together & talking and all that...not her and some dumba..

 

i would give her the altimatum that she either stop what's she's doing & come clean or that she needs to get the hell out.

[Ingrid]

There are two things one can conclude :

 

1. This gal did not marry you for love 0X , and

 

2. You are marrying the wrong kind of women (why?)

 

1. She is still in love with him and wants to keep a relationship with him which is contrary to marriage. When you marry, you are supposed to bury your former relationships.

 

She is lying to you and there are probably other reasons why she married you : material comfort probably (???) you are the one who knows.

 

2. What kind of women do you meet? Do you like flirtatious women who get passionate right away? You have to learn to discern people and stop being naive.

 

Do you want to be the idiot husband who supports his wife while she is fooling aroung with other guys? She is a cheater with NO DOUBT, she lies to you and is taking advantage of you! After two months already cheating? You deserve better.

 

I advise you to stop being a doormat and a cash machine and look for a real woman. There are tons of good women looking for a man like you.

 

Take care!