My friend was attacking me and my ex...

[baxxter]

Hello People,

 

So I broke NC to send my ex my final email (plz see my other thread if you are interested,) last night, and it WAS emotionally exhausting. After that I felt like I am at the beginning of my new life, refreshing, yet scary.

 

I mean, throwing all my load off to my ex was a big decision to make, and even though I waited till I was completely ready for it that didn't mean it was a piece of p**s.

 

So I just wanted to keep my spirit high and strong. Got up this morning feeling good, went to work. It was a busy day, and by the end I was DRAINED. I needed to lift my mood!

 

Then I was chatting to a girl at work who knew of my story, and she asked,

 

"Has he replied?"

 

I said he is a game player and so he won't reply right away, as I NC-ed him for 3 wks. Plus he is very emotionally reserved.

 

THEN she started to rant the following;

"Oh, I think you were used by him, you were the easy prey."

"I think he had another girlfriend. You were his #2!"

 

I said that's absurd, he is not like that (why am I defending a guy who left me?), then she said,

"But he left you for such small reasons, he is so cold. He did that because it was you."

 

I was practically screaming at her to stop, yet she goes on,

"He will be so nice to the next girl he dates."

 

What??????? OMG!!!!!!!!

 

I then started to explain that I think he has fear of commitment and he will always have issues with anyone, it was NOT my fault that he ran,

 

"No, I think he will completely change for the next girl."

 

I was pretty much shouting at her to stop, and this all happened while I was giving her a lift.

 

Why would anyone say those horrible, accusations on someone who she never met, except to hurt ME??

 

I just couldn't believe it. I was so upset after I got rid of her at hers. I came back home and cried. My, I don't need this.

 

Why would anyone do this, why, why?

[bearskittie]

can i ask are you sure she doesnt know your ex because she might be his next girl or she as a grudge against you for some reason.

[baxxter]

she is happily married and pregnant, lives 40 miles from him and never travels apart from to and from work, so chances are minuscule.

 

She was very close to me once, I still am the only one who was invited to her new house.

[bearskittie]

mmm ok was she having a bad day?

I cant imagine my friends being so cruel she sounds abit of a nasty so an so.

[ayekasong]

This "friend" sounds pretty toxic. I'd avoid telling her anything personal from now on. If she broaches the subject of your ex again, I'd refuse to engage in the conversation.

[fuddiduddy]

Something is severely wrong there. Maybe she was having a bad day and took it out on you? Maybe she has some mental illness you're not privy to? Maybe she is just a horrible person? Who knows? (She sounds like a nut to me, really)

 

All I know, is that I'm not sure I'd be talking to her for awhile. I mean, those are things you just don't tell a heartbroken soul. You did not deserve that at all.

 

Don't listen to her. Her words came from a bad place within her and likely has no validity.

[baxxter]

Thank you for your kind words,

She doesn't have any mental illness (maybe some eating disorder, but everyone has self-image issues,) and everyone at my work loves her, she is supposed to be the level-headed one. But I think she never had good relationship with men before she met her hubby. Like she had a sugar daddy for years, and then was involved with a married boss etc.

 

It was like her telling me,

"ha-ha, you idiot, you let it all happen!"

Does she hate me or what?

 

fuddiduddy,

Thank you. As much as I hate to defend my ex he was a sincere, caring guy who would never even look at another girl. There is absolutely no validity in her "theory".

 

I will never do anything like this to a broken heat, never.

[Papillion]

what a dreadful hurtful way to speak to you.

 

and she's meant to be your friend?

 

jesus, i can't imagine how she must speak to her enemies then.

 

i'm sorry you had to listen to her garbage when you were most probably feeling sensitive and needed a bit of support.

[incaangelique]

She has no idea what she is talking about. Saying that the ex will be nice to the next girl is based on nothing. So don't even think about anything she said.

[baxxter]

Thank you again for kind posts,

 

I no longer consider her as a friend, and I will not reveal anything personal to her.

Feel so much better now, thanks to you all xx

[Papillion]

i dont blame you for de-friending her.

 

if you're letting go of your ex and starting afresh, now is probably a good time to ditch unwanted friends as well.

 

good luck hon x