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Starting to like someone....

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Healthy or not? Feelings for my ex are still there, I'm still healing and making closure for myself, and it's only been one month 1 week since we broke up. (Fyi, it was a cold break-up after two years and has been strict NC)


A very good friend has been there for me all along. He texts me to check up on me, has let me vent/ talk about the break-up, and overall, has been a great friend. We hang out several times a week and have a great time always. School has been my main focus lately and hanging out with my friend makes me feel alive again whenever we hang out...


However, my goal is to get over my ex in a healthy way. I have no plans to pursue even further with this friend romantically anytime soon, but I enjoy the time we spend together.


Should I isolate myself from him for awhile? Or still spend time with him while taking the time to heal?

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Well, it wasn't healthy for me because I got the cold shoulder after I thought "hey, I think I like this girl."


BUT, I think the ability to like someone else is very important and a very good sign. Be careful, though, because rejection just tears a hole through everything and makes you unsure of your progress if it comes down to that.

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Take it slow. But if in the next month you're ready to move forward then do so.


Everyone has different healing periods. I had a friend who got over her ex within a month. She was a 100% herself still, having fun, not moping, and didn't care what happened to him. She began dating that next month. I have a friend who took two years to get over her ex and she still isn't ready.


For some people the healing/dating period is short.


For instance I have a short period as well. I've discovered that I'm usually able to move forward and adjust 2 months after a relationship is ended. As mean and as cold as that may seem, it's extremely hard for me to dwell on something that wasn't mean to be. So once it's done, it is done. UNLESS I feel that the relationship has potential still.

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It's a good sign you like someone! I wouldn't recommend overlapping emotionally though - drags old stuff into a new relationship which makes things rocky ....


I'd give yourself time to heal but take comfort in the fact you are open to other people ... it's a sign of progress.

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Maybe I'm just paranoid, but this has all the hallmarks of a rebound relationship if you go down that path. Maybe having been in the situation of being the rebound girl and subsequently getting dumped because he still had feelings for his ex makes me ultra sensitive to it in these posts though.

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