Don't know why, but I'm wondering

[hankmb]

So it's been over a year since we split, together for 5. She ended it, and it ended bad. We kept in contact very sporadically until the beginning of the year when I just stopped contacting her.

 

Aside from a drunken phone call, initiated by her, on valentines day. Which I don't remember exactly what was said because I too was a bit drunk. All I remember is that she cried a lot. I changed my number immediately after the call as well. We have not had any contact.

 

Well a couple days ago, I was on instant messenger and she reached out to me. She started asking about a mutual friend who was having some real important stuff happening. I just answered her questions, explained the friends complete situation, then just left it at that. After which she writes, that I am a very important part of her life and she really hopes we could be friends. To which I responded like, maybe, but I don't want to make you feel bad.

 

 

Should be noted, that when she left, she said she deserved to see if she could do better. I know that if she was viewing things like money, career, intellegence or success. She did do "better". Mind you I'm no slouch, it's just that the class of people she is mixed up with now is.... well out of my class.

 

So I guess the question is why did she bother to reach out now?

Guilt? I don't know, I mean why still feel guilty?

 

Also, have not heard from her since....

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Sometimes an ex reaches out to test the waters, sometimes it is for an ego boost and sometimes they are just feeling nostalgic for a brief moment. If she is seeing someone else then perhaps things are not so rosy in that relationship despite the money, intelligence, career and success. Remember that someone can have all of that and yet there can still be incompatibilities.

[hankmb]

Thanks for responding.

 

Yeah, it just kind of bugs me that she could tell me I'm still important to her. I mean I thought she was smarter. For her to say we could still be friends, without offering an apology, not even an insincere one for the things she was responsible for at the end is just insane. This was my best friend. I seriously believe she had convinced herself I was to blame.

 

When we spoke in October, I told her I could never be her friend because it would always remind me I failed. I asked her if she remembered saying she didn't respect me and could do better. To which she responded, I never said that. Really!? Why would I make it up.... I just let the disagreement end there because I felt there nothing to say.

 

Anyway thanks again. I'm just going to keep on keeping on. I'll listen if she wants to talk, but I by no means am going to try to contact her.