Some advice ?

[uncoolguy]

Not sure where to put this ?

 

 

To introduce myself I’m a 21 year old university student, I have a major problem in my life at the moment and need some advice/assistance on what to do. So if you have time please listen to my story and give me some advice, it would be much appreciated.

 

Basically as I was growing up I was a bit of a failure/looser, always going to school late and failing exams and assignments and getting in trouble and mixing with * * * * people. Yet I had a lot of friends always around me and had someone to always talk to or go see or party with etc.

 

As I finished high school I had realized I didn’t want to end up having a crappy job and wanted better things in life for myself. Since I had a terrible score to get into any university, I had then enrolled into a community college, during high school I didn’t really mix in with any “academic” students, it had hit me that a lot of my friends were basically loosers and were going to stay that way for either a long time or fore ever, So I decided to make some new friends from the same high school at the time.

 

After a year of community college I had realized that I was very enthusiastic about what I was studying and towards the end of the year I had spent many days and hours applying for junior position jobs and going against university students for junior positions. Luckily one interview was with a large company and I had to complete a test to make it further into another interview, I had even beaten some university graduates to make it further and in the end I had received the position.

 

As soon I had received this position, I had realized that some of my friends have stopped talking to me. I had spent a year there and after that I had decided I wanted to go to university so I had applied for university the following year and made into a medium grade university through my grades at the community college. From this point I had lost a lot of friends and I couldn’t figure out why ?. As I had become fairly competitive I decided that I wanted to attend a better university. I worked my ass off for the year and stayed up for days and days so I can achieve good marks, after that I applied to one of the top 50 universities in the world (without naming any) and made it in.

 

From there I had applied for a part time role with a large firm in my industry while attending the good university, I got in and I now have a fairly good job and a lot of responsibility for someone my age. After this the new friends I had made after high school all stopped talking to me and ever inviting me out.

 

The problem I have is that I pretty much have no friends left and I have not done anything wrong to anyone, I never even speak about myself or anything and I love going out and being social, I’m not a awkward guy or anything at all.

 

Keep in mind these are all guys..... every girl I meet doesn’t have a problem with what I do or where I am studying or anything about me.... I just can’t make any guy friends.. So I pretty much spend my days screwing broads that I meet here and there .. Why ? ... I don’t even know .. maybe to make myself feel better ??.... but I don’t have any guy friends at all .... To be exact I have lost about 8 or so really close good friends that I would go out with on weekends and see on weekdays for no absolute reason.

 

I have even attempted to meet new people in my course but as soon I tell them where I work and what I do, the next time they walk into the lecture they don’t make eye contact and ignore me.

 

As bad as this is going to sound .. but my suspicion is that a lot of these people are jealous of me, maybe because I was like them when we were younger and now I am a little more successful than them ? and maybe I remind them of their failures of life because I was probably worse than them in high school (academically and in general)...

 

I don’t really know what to do .. I was thinking I could start lying to people and telling them I work in a butcher or something ?

 

Its been 4 years since high school has finished and I have gone from a guy who had tons and tons of friends and going to house parties every weekend... To staying at home on weekends and sifting through facebook to see if theres anyone whos bored and wants to go out for a drink somewhere or come around for a game on the playstation..

 

If any of you guys have any advice on what I should do .. or how I should go about this.. that would be great ...

[Distant]

To start off with, im happy for you. The fact that you were able to turn your life around with school is an amazing accomplishment.

 

As for the friends, I am in the same boat. All my friends left me after high school. I was lucky to keep a few very close friends. An idea to make new friends would be go to the clubs or bars or even bowling alleys. Concerts and events. Even making friends online is becoming popular.

 

Good luck with this. Keep us informed.

[Ebrithil]

I wouldnt say people are jellouse but maybe somtimes intimidated, I dont find myself with many friends these days when I was in college I had quite a few, and one thing I find that helps to make new friends is to just show a really big intrest in their life. People love it when people pay attention to them, so if you can focus the conversation on them and make them feel comfertable talking to you then prehaps youll make new or re-new some friendships.

[oldenoughtoknow]

Good for you! It sounds like you're off to a great start in life. You have grown and matured a tremendous amount in the past 4 years. Not everyone is comfortable with that fast of a pace. Are there any guys around your age at work you could talk to? What are your hobbies? Maybe you could find a local activity group based on one of them. There, you would meet people with similar interests. link removed is a good place to start.

[valenski]

First off, there is nothing wrong with a little ambition! High school was high school its time to evolve, yes the world might be scary at first but take the plunge. I'm assuming you are still at university, try your fraternities, go to sporting events, look for large groups of people gathered together to protest something etc, go to church and get involved. And stop being so paranoid that your field is so cut throat because although there are people out there that will step on you to get a head, they are out numbered by people who dont care what you do. Get out there.