People Who Have Been With S.O. That Suffer From Depression

[getbiii]

Some Tips on Being in a relationship with a depressed person?

or more like how can i help my girl and her depression?

 

i know the basic do's and dont's,

she seems to feel better around me, she comes over to my house to just sleep together and watch movies and leaves with a smile...

at first i thought i might have been causing her depression to be worse but it turns out sometimes when she feels bad she'll just miss me a lot and want to see me and be with me but when she can't she just starts to spiral downward.

 

 

i wanna help her get out of her depression and i know that sitting around might make her feel good but its not be a permanent solution, i've heard exercise is really really good but i can't seem to get her to do much, what are some ways i can kind of persuade her into going out more?

 

also what are other things you did to help your S.o. ??

 

i know the obvious of therapy and meds,

 

but she is already on meds and has been for some time, she also goes to therapy, but i know as i have also had my fair share with depresion issues that it is something that you deal with yourself and you get out by yourself, the meds just help to numb the pain and therapy isn't for everyone,

 

could you share your experience with me please, it would really help

 

 

 

thank you.

 

 

[XxJustMexX]

My last bf has major depression issues... Despite knowing him for the past 15 years, how great of friends we were, and how close we were prior to dating, he still managed to break my heart during a deep episode he had beginning of this year. I'm sorry to say, but when dealing with a depressed person, you're going to be affected heavily as well.

 

My ex was absolutely happy and normal one day, then woke up the next day not knowing what he wanted in life and severely depressed... this was when we broke up. It's very normal for a depressed person to break off relationships with people when they reach a low because they start feeling inadequate, unhappy, confused... To make it worse, for the last month of our relationship, it was an LDR as he decided to move out of state for a job. That brings me to say that physical presence is very important in a relationship with a depressed loved one... Lack of your presence can cause they to spiral downward as well...

 

I wish I could help further but I gotta go for now so if you'd like to search my past posts, I've written about my issues with him and his depression... Try searching for my posts around February/March of this year...

[Firiel]

I was the partner that was struggling with depression/anxiety/being crazy. It was really tough on my fiance. I didn't fully understand my actions during that time... it's very hard to explain. I got quite dependent, to where he was one of the only things that could make me happy and where he was the only one I could talk to. So I burdened him with my problems a lot. There were a few times when he tried to call me out on it, and it never really went over well. Part of my depression was feeling very badly about myself, so I took his (kindly spoken and legitimate) criticisms to heart and would feel like I wasn't good enough for him or that he didn't love me the way I was.

 

It's good that she is already going to therapy. It sounds, though, like she is becoming rather dependent on you. Can you talk to her friends and ask them to make sure she is invited to social outings? I think you should be encouraging her to spend time with healthy people other than you (not that you should jump out of her life, just that you should encourage her to see a variety of people). Perhaps you and she can get involved in a club or do a sport together. Many cities have co-ed softball leagues in the summer. Just try to encourage her to get out and do things. Call her out on her behavior if you need to, but always do it with love and not in frustration. Think about it for a day and plan out what you are going to say so it doesn't come of as anger. And be prepared that she might take it the wrong way.

 

Edit: Also, if her meds are not doing the trick, perhaps she should go see a doctor again. Maybe she needs an increased dosage or a different type of medication.

[getbiii]

thank you guys for your help =)

 

 

 

any other opinions?

[abitbroken]

thank you guys for your help =)

 

 

 

any other opinions?

 

Don't try to fix or cure her. And if it all gets to be too much to deal with for you, be honest.

[getbiii]

i know i cant cure her/fix her, i just wanna be by her side while she gets thru this and do what ever i can to help =)

[penelope13]

an important thing is to get support for yourself to lean on, since things can get tough and you might get discouraged in which case you can't lean on her. Therefore it's essential for you to not completely take over the role as the caregiver and to completely forget your own mental health/ happiness. If you can afford it, seek counseling as well, otherwise foster your close friendships.

[abitbroken]

I am the one suffering from depression in my relationship. it's something you're always going to have to deal with as long as you're with this person. I'd say have her grt on new meds or a higher dose. She shouldn't still be depressed if they are working. Also, just be there for her and do things that make her happy, shopping at her fav places,eating at her fav resturaunts, watch her fav movies. etc.

 

But be careful to not create a situation where you are indulging her and spoiling her constantly or giving more emotionally or physically than you can give. Treating someone kindly and waiting on them hand and foot all the time are different things.

 

Also - there are people who are depressed that suffer from seasonal affective disorder OR they have a serotonin imbalance. These folks can improve greatly by getting out in the sunshine as soon as possible in the morning, shutting off the lights at a certain time at night and using full spectrum light bulbs around the house.