I was awesome! Until the worst week of my life.

[restingpieces]

In just one day, my grandfather was diagnosed with throat cancer and then my dad was admitted to the hospital after some chest pain - only for us to discover he needed a bypass! The surgery was problematic but he did make it out alive. He's not all that well... Then, days later, my little brother attempted suicide.

 

Family has slowly started to trickle back to their respective locations around the country as things are seemingly settling down and dad is out of the hospital. But I'm here, helping mom and dad - feeling overwhelmed with all of these emotions of what's going on in my home. I was doing remarkably well in healing leading up to all of this misfortune... now, I just need some sort of comfort. I don't intend to reach out to my ex - what would I get? "That sucks, I'm sorry."

 

But the urge is there and that has me down. I feel like in just feeling it I'm taking steps backward... just a fleeting moment of weakness, right?

[HouseKitten]

It's completely normal to crave comfort from someone who has previously provided exactly that. Don't be down on yourself for it. If you don't want to act on it and you don't end up doing so then it's no big deal - you're allowed to think about contacting them all you want

 

I'm sorry all these things have happened to you recently. But it sounds like your dad is pulling through! My dad had an operation recently as well and he was laid up in bed for some time. It sounds like you're doing what you can to help him and that's great. Just be sure to make some time to see friends you can talk to, or other family members who can listen.

[d_lilah]

My heart really goes out to you. To get through all of that must have been tough, but here you are. You haven't contacted your ex so far, and that already says so much about you. You've already shown you can get through the worst of it, and now you just have to keep your head held high.

 

At the end of all of this, you will feel like a stronger, more capable person. Believe me.

 

A few weeks back, someone really close to me passed away. It was cancer. At the time, the first thought in my head was to reach out and text my ex, but I knew that nothing would come of it. I didn't, and I feel my life has taken a big step since then. This is my life. And I don't have to rely on him anymore.

 

Just take one moment at a time. Just remember, you ARE a strong person, and you can take control of the situation.

[restingpieces]

I'm sincerely so sorry to hear about your friend. But its great to hear you came out better for it. Nothing like life making personal issues seem so trivial, huh?

 

I guess that's why I feel so dumb right now. It is so trivial, when I look at the bigger picture. I have so much going on at home but when its paired with all that happened in these past 4 months... I've honestly never felt like I have absolutely zero control over anything until lately. Everything seems to be going south and I feel pathetic for whining about it. 2010 just hasn't really cut me any slack and I'm starting to lose hope in things getting better.

[yonanz]

stay strong dude....everytime when something bad happens after a breaKup, we automaticall find the need to turn to our ex for that comfort. its natural, but its ultimately damaging. ur ex is no longer a concern in your life. its natural to want to gravitate to that someone who has provided you support and comfort te past many years or months, but now shes gone, we really need to learn to stand on our own feet and stop depending on someone esle for strength and comfort because that will only screw with our feelings and emotions. what will u get if u text her? all u get is some cursory words of comfort, and then also, painful reminders of the breaKup and a sense of rejection and a sense of dejection of being bacK to square one again.

 

im sorry about your father and ur grandpa...hope they are doing fine.