for people who are friends with their ex...

[cntrofthestorm]

I'm not really planning on doing this but i just need to get the thought out of my head for future reference lol

 

did you tell them you were ready to be friends again to make sure that they still wanted to and weren't taking out of guilt, or did you just naturally become friends again?

 

I'm generally not that open to being friends with my ex again but i find as i'm healing i can eventually see it as being an option down the road, without the intention of getting back together.

[G-Snap]

Me and my ex are pretty good friends but it took about six months. I actually talk to him all the time. It's nice, we bounce things off of each other, help each other sometimes. He's someone if I need to vent about something, I can call him and just let the anger rip and he'll give me a good perspective on things.

 

If you have both moved on it can happen, if not then you might want to just hold off.

[uncomfynumb]

I've thought about being friends with my ex too, because that is what he said he wanted (hahahahahaha) but seriously, I don't plan to be single for too much longer and how weird might that be? Will my current beau appreciate it?

 

I don't know about you but since my ex dropped me like I was a hot potato, I'm thinking of my future and it is leaning heavily and steadily towards not having him in it...

 

Only be friends after you have completely moved on and have no interest in reconcilliation and then, look into friendship if it means that much to you. My guess is that after you have moved on, it won't.

 

Their loss eh?

[absinthe]

Here's a litmus test that I've used in the past and have since perfected. Imagine your ex with someone else having hot, sweaty sex, trading "ILY"s in post-coital tenderness. If this doesn't bother you in any way, you're ready to be friends. Beyond that, you're fooling yourself.

 

This is coming from someone who's currently friends with 4 different exes.

[G-Snap]

Here's a litmus test that I've used in the past and have since perfected. Imagine your ex with someone else having hot, sweaty sex, trading "ILY"s in post-coital tenderness. If this doesn't bother you in any way, you're ready to be friends. Beyond that, you're fooling yourself.

 

This is coming from someone who's currently friends with 4 different exes.

 

LMAO what a great barometer to use!!!!!

 

And I passed that litmus test. lol with flying colors.

[Clarity]

It's not something that I ever sought out, nor is it something that happened when one of us said "I'd like to still be friends" fresh after the break up. It happened over a year after the break up, and well after she (the dumper) wanted to get back together and I declined.

 

We were best friends for 7 years and now we're just friends, not too close, but still talk occasionally. She sometimes asks me about problems with her current BF and I give her my honest opinion.

 

As absinthe has correctly pointed out, it's only really possible if neither of you are still yearning for the other.

[J1535]

Here's a litmus test that I've used in the past and have since perfected. Imagine your ex with someone else having hot, sweaty sex, trading "ILY"s in post-coital tenderness. If this doesn't bother you in any way, you're ready to be friends. Beyond that, you're fooling yourself.

 

This is coming from someone who's currently friends with 4 different exes.

 

Good one, and seeing how that was hard to read, even imagine, I am far from passing that test. I hope to one day be friends with my ex. i just don't know how long that is going to take

[danix0x0x0]

nope didnt pass... darn it

[jahur]

i could never do it, once the rot sets in thats it.

 

i find it hard to accept that friends thing, you have, say for instance, been with you s/o for 2 years you break up, if you were to be friends after why split up? it to me seems like a subconscience way of keeping in there for those who cannot subconsciencely let go. lets face it, if you do stay mates it usually fizzles out when you move on, hence the subconscience way of keeping in there for those who cannot subconsciencely let go, just a theory, but i see truth in it.