Why to get back together after a rebound?

[alexinter2003]

why sometimes do we still want to get back together after a rebound?

 

why?

 

when is it acceptable and when is it no?

 

If love was there should have not the couple work things out rather than quit?

 

Sometimes things do not work out and may be fine to work it out after a while with or without a rebound.

 

but sometimes might just not be needed to wait for the rebound or work its way around.

[MikNomis]

We want to get back together because we miss the other person. We tend to remember the good memories and barely the bad ones, but once you get back together you are reminded of those bad memories again, causing another breakup.

 

So intuitively, it is acceptable to get back together if whatever caused the breakup is fixed.

 

Love needs compromise from both sides to work I think. And love is everywhere. Everyone is a potential lover.

[alexinter2003]

Well, as you said and i understand it the same way, Love needs compromise.

Commitment to fix things rather than leaving once things get a bit sour.

 

My point here is that in some relationships around 3- 4 years down the road the passion of the early stages may fade away, the routine or other issues may come into scene... and some people just prefer leaving the relationship rather than working it out.

 

It does not matter how good were the good times, it seems to me, there is just people who lack commitment to the relationship and prefer to start a brand new "love

Although, as any other relationship would follow its own stages of honeymoon...

 

Yep. Totally agree with you "Love needs compromise from both sides to work I think. And love is everywhere. Everyone is a potential lover. "

 

cheers,

[alexinter2003]

forgot to say

 

that in my humble opinion in some of these cases where we are in front of a person who quits rather than facing and solving issues...

 

may not be worth trying to reconect after a while...

 

In some cases even after a rebound.

So, basically what that person would be telling us is that the first relationship was fine but then got some issues.

And as were more of a hassle to fixe them, that person took the joy of taking a rebound to feel great...

and once the rebound apears not to be what it was... then go back to the old person again...

 

those sort of circumstances seem to me where one should have some sort of self respect and esteem and move on with its life.

 

As the dumper probed no commitment at all on the first place and decided to replace the relationship with a rebound.

[Keyman]

So, from the dumpee's side, the dumper couldn't or didn't want to resolve the issues so decided to go boff someone else instead, then when that didn't work decided to come crawling back.

 

If I was the dumpee, I would not be taking that person back again, no matter how much he/she grovelled, begged or tried to convince me that they loved me.

 

What's not to say when there are troubles again, they will seek respite between the legs of someone else?

[intolerable]

So, from the dumpee's side, the dumper couldn't or didn't want to resolve the issues so decided to go boff someone else instead, then when that didn't work decided to come crawling back.

 

If I was the dumpee, I would not be taking that person back again, no matter how much he/she grovelled, begged or tried to convince me that they loved me.

 

What's not to say when there are troubles again, they will seek respite between the legs of someone else?

 

I agree with Keyman. Sometimes, you just can't bring back the trust.

[alexinter2003]

Thanks guys

 

yep, that was my point.

If there is a split or someone is dumped without no third person involved, and then someoen gets into a rebound, then one could expect to get the ex back.

As the rebound may be a way to ease the pain away.

 

Though in cases were there was a cheating and the dumper went away with that third person, I believe is not worth even thinking of getting this person back.

 

It is just not worth it.

[woodst0ck]

Sometimes, you just can't bring back the trust.

 

Quoted for truth. However, there is one way. If the dumper can really make me believe they made a mistake leaving in the first place. I can accept that everyone makes mistakes... sometimes they are big ones.... but I wouldn't feel right if I didn't at least consider it.

[alexinter2003]

Yes.

that is true woodst0ck.

We are humans and should accept all of us can make mistakes.

 

though might be quite difficult to know a person has learnt about its own mistakes...

 

Is really easy for some people just to crawl back and beg for a second chance...