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Must never put loving couples on pedestals again,

Pall Wall

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John & Megan, cool loving couple I came to be friends with the past few months. I took such shine to them, and they took shine to me, welcoming me, making me feel so well accepted. A feeling I haven't felt in a while. Of course thoe they are also young, Megan is about 19, John is now 21. I've always admired they're loving relationship. I was so convinced they'd eventually tie the knot for sure.


But up until till today, learning they are broke up because John has in fact been cheating, as I heard from a reliable source that Megan found messages in his phone that comfirm it. So I'm sure she'll be moving out of his house, and into her mothers for the time being.


I've thought the world of them, felt inspired by them. I don't want to be one to choose sides, but deep down, if I were to choose one it would be Megan. Because one time she was lookin' out for me, warning me about something very personal to save me from getting my feelings hurt. Because she understands my sensitive side better than John would. He's mean, but in that kind of way that most guys rip each other apart way. Like "Hey we're guys, guys mess around with each other." But Megan see's that I'm not the type, she knows I'm different.


I would also choose Megan's side because I'm disappointed in John for cheating on her. I may not have had enough relationship experience. But I do know when I see a person taking things for granted, espicially people, and when I look back, I believe that John did. There have been times where I'm hanging with him at his house, she'd call him being on her way home from work, and he'd be all like "Can you get me cigarettes while your out, just cause' you love me, just cause' I love you." And she'd do it for him. Or the same thing with her when she's home, "Can you get that for me, cause' I love you" to her. There has just been times when I've been around him and her, and based on what'd be said and done, I'd think to myself, "Uhh Dude I thinhk you should be a littttle more considerate if I were you." I mean hell she recently had just dyed her hair a darker color to dazzle him since he made a personal request, and he's still sleeping with someone else.


I won't be dismissive of John if I see him. I don't want to be drawn into a crossfire with them. I just don't get why he'd cheat on her. She's very attractive, very considerate, she did a lot for him.

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Oh no, I have no intention of getting together with her. I just intend to remain a good friend to her.


Seems fine enough.


You don't have to choose a side. And, if they are good friends, they won't put you in that sort of position. If you naturally like one over the other, it makes sense that you'd be closer that person.

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It's true that any and every couple has it in them to break up, and every relationship exists in an hour glass of sand, but when the breakup does happen, it's not about who's right or wrong, or who is bad or good. It's just human nature. People breakup. And really, this is their deal. You have no idea about what went on behind closed doors.


As for the "Do this for me because I love you" bit. Honestly, you could learn something from that. People want to feel needed. People also want to be with partners who aren't afraid to tell you their needs, and aren't afraid to ask for what they want. It means that you're with a pro-active partner who isn't afraid to be him/herself. Most people, whether they realize it or not, will find partners like that refreshing and annoyingly attractive.


Now, the cheating? Of course there is no excuse for that, and she will be happy in the end that she moved on. Teasing and playing though? "Buy me this because you love me!" ? There's not only nothing wrong with that. Take a page from that particular play book. Learn to ask for what you want unapologetcily.

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Can happen to the best of them. Two of my dearest friends I've known for 22 years, they've been married 20 years, two little kids, house, good jobs just split. They were one of the best couples I knew. She apparently had a mid-life crisis and started doing the next door neighbor who's old enough to be her son. So now they're on the road to divorceville. Nasty stuff that marriage business. Familiarity breeds contempt, I guess. *singing* I wanna be masochistic, I wanna be a statistic...

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