Considering, but I need some advice

[infinity8246]

First off, I'm new to these forums and would just like to say HI! to start out.

 

Anyways, so I've been dating my current girlfriend for almost a year now, but I think the end's coming on. I'm not doing too bad, because the end would be due to me...but then again, at the same time, I want us to stay together.

 

Lately, I've just felt like there's nothing really there anymore. I know she's so in love with me...making this even harder for me to make a decision. Maybe it's just the end of the school year and all of this stress that's coming down upon me. A lot of my friends are leaving for college and I'm stuck back here another year, and that's quite emotionally draining on me. It's like everything has pretty much made me devoid of strength to care anymore. The only things I seem to care about anymore are my music and my friends. Not really her anymore. But, school's almost out, and she's leaving for two weeks, which will give us a break. I'm wondering whether or not I should wait until after the break to make a decision. What's even harder though, is that the day she gets back is our one year, and she's expecting to celebrate. But with things like they are, I just don't know anymore.

 

Interesting side note on this too. One of my ex-girlfriend's and I, well, we've been good friends even the day after we broke up and stayed that way. Lately though, I've grown really close to her, and we really are best friends. I was over her, but I'm starting to be highly attracted to her again. She's leaving for college in another state, so that's out, but still, anyone think it might be contributing to my lack of caring? It's like with my ex I actually really want her back, and if not that, I just want her friendship with me to never end, EVER, for any reason...I don't know anymore...So confused.

[tiff8434]

Please just be careful in whatever you decide. If this girl loves you as much as you say she does, she will be very hurt and may not be receptive if you ever wanted her back. If you are not happy by all means break it off before she goes away because acting as if you dont care on your 1 year will be way more painful. Good Luck!

[Mattyboy]

OK I feel like putting a comment to this one:

 

there's two ways this is going to go.

 

A: you break up with her before...

 

If you do this you are going to hurt her badly (but you'll do that anyway if you break up) and you will wreck her holiday

 

B: you break up after...

 

If you do this at least wait till after your 1st it will be hard but i know which option i'd prefer being on the receiving end.

 

personally i'd go for option B for the main reason that the break should do you good and you could realise how much you'll miss her if you do finish it.

 

either way let us know.

 

Mattyboy

 

P.S forget about the EX it's not worth the hassle just stay friends

[infinity8246]

Thanks for all the advice going here so far.

 

The more I think about it, the more I really just don't want anyone to be hurt. I know she'll be hurt a lot, and I don't even want to do that to her. She's too great of a girl, but sometimes, it's inevitable. And even myself, I know that I'd have slight problems getting used to the fact that I'm not dating her anymore...but I think it may be for the best. I really think I'm going to wait until after though just to give me more thinking time and let my mind clear up.

[Michael2]

Infinity, unfortunately I think you made up your mind.

 

And I guarantee, if your ex , was not in the picture, this decision wouldnt be quite a dilema. Do not live in a fantasy world, picturing what it would be like to be with your ex again. You are idiolizing the fantasy and not reality.

 

You better start thinking long and hard about this one. This whole hurt thing is inevitable, you have to do what is best for you. You sound young, and know this is diffuclt for you. But keep this in mind. I have a feeling this is how things will pan out.

 

Your girlfriend goes on holiday;comes back , you tell her you need space. You then proceed to hookup with your ex, because your conscience is now "clear". Your now ex girlfriend is crushed when she finds out. You finally realize that your fantasy hookup with the ex, was just that, a fantasy. Then you regret breaking up with the current girl and attempt to reconcile. Be careful going down this path.

[infinity8246]

I hear ya. I wouldn't want to try that with my ex. At least not right now. What I do know is that if my ex said that she would want to date me again, I would break up with my girlfriend now in a second. Not to say I don't love her, but my ex...she's the greatest girl...hell, greatest person I've ever know. But that would probably never happen, at least at this point in time. We both have intentions of staying in touch when she goes to college for a while, and who knows, maybe we'll get back together. I'm not getting my hopes up. She'll probably have found someone in college by then, and chances are I'll have done the same. I just want to be happy with a girl I love so much.

 

But this is beside the point. I really think I'll probably end up breaking up with my girlfriend, it's really just a question of when. Doing it now would probably not be the best option considering things might change, and right when she gets back after our one year...that would be ten times worse. I don't know what I'm going to do yet. Still thinking.